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A-Z of what is pissing me off

Angelina Jolie - remember 1999? That was the last time she was in a good movie.
Bill O'Reilly - hasn't said anything shameful recently, but he will.
Cable - why do we have to pay when there is nothing good on?
Dieting - why can't this be enjoyable?
Edible Arrangements - something is just weird about this actually making money.
Fuel prices - they've very quietly risen 66 cents in the last six weeks.
Grey's Anatomy - making people stupid since 2005
Heath Ledger - alright already, he was no James Dean, hell not even a River Phoenix!
IRS - for making me a lot poorer than I should be. OK it's my fault, but come on.
Joaquin Phoenix - for being one of the best actors not acting. Stop being weird. Act!
Kohl's - for advertising way more than you have to.
Lost - for confusing my smart friends and for making my dumb friends explain it.
Money - for me not having enough of you.
Night - the only time I'm wide awake.
Obama - for saying "change" when you should have said "fix what Bush did."
Promotional Mail - I don't want any more magazines for $6 a year.
Queens - for being just far enough away that I'm too lazy to eat there every day.
Reality TV - for sucking the tiny brains out of Americans everywhere.
Scientology - for making John Travolta negligent.
Twitter - I don't even know what it is.
Universal health care - for being so complicated that republicans can't understand it
Verizon - do I even need a reason?
Weather - for being such a stirring topic among the mindless. Hot or cold - riveting!
X-rated - for not having anything to do with my life.
Zero - what I feel I accomplished today. Oh yeah I started a diet. Zero enjoyment!

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