Ever since internet memes, motivational posters, social media, and misquoting became the norm, one familiar, cliched, and infuriatingly common concept is that people should be kind, because it takes nothing. Could anything be more incorrect? Being kind isn't a normal human response. Being kind means that one must choose another over themselves. That they must be devoid of judgment and prejudice. It means they must be compassionate, sympathetic, and when possible, empathetic.
How many people do you know that exhibit these features without effort?
Being kind, with how our world has created us, is work. Relationships, parenting, friendships, and simple bonds, long and short, with acquaintances, come from some form of trust, honesty, and understanding. Three feelings that take time. To form them with a stranger is a rarity.
This is not to say we should not all try to be kind, but it is very important to recognize that kindness is very often a difficult behavior, because of our environment, life experiences, and our learned prejudices. Kindness, for all its value and merit, is not at all the norm. Kindness, true kindness, is rare because it demands zero reciprocation. Once you look for nothing from others, think of them before yourself, then maybe, possibly, you can show true kindness. Reciprocal kindness is easy, which makes telling others to be kind, somewhat hypocritical.
In today's world, I think we should strive to be more self-aware, more aware of others, and aware of our actions and make sure what we think we are conveying is what we actually do. I think most people would be shocked to find out how selfish they are when demanding other's kindness.
Maybe "be fair," is a little more tangible plea.
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