Hop's Thoughts

These two words flood your social media, your tv screen, and your print ads. They are tied into quotes, memes, anecdotes, statuses, and nearly every foundation there is. Be Kind. Rarely do those who share these words demonstrate kindness when Others aren't as kind to them Others aren't kind to them first If it doesn't benefit them If they aren't thanking someone for something extra If it's inconvenient If it's uncomfortable They aren't feeling well They are angry They are sad They feel unappreciated They aren't getting paid Nobody will know if they're not To strangers To animals To those who need it most To those who don't expect it Without telling others of their kindness Without telling others of their kindness's randomness If you're as old as I am, just think about most of the Blockbuster videos you rented and you know just how kind   people are. Kindness is the most basic form of benevolence one should demonstra...

What started out as necessity has turned into a way of life. Have you ever not bought anything you didn't need? Driven by the coffee shop, because you had coffee at home and didn't really need the second cup Filled your tank and not grabbed the chips or the scratch-off Put back the second package of whatever that said 2 for $5, knowing you didn't need that much? Not cashing or depositing your check until you needed it? Resisting the urge to fill your life with stuff? Taking a year off, or maybe a lifetime, from fast food, delivery, take-out, and delis? Resisting the new release, knowing there are classics available online or the library. Never once buying a DVD, CD, or gadget to play or listen to both Have you ever learned to enjoy the limitless options of your surroundings? Have you ever been at peace enough to enjoy solitude? Have you ever chosen just one vice and limited yourself to it? I'll let you know how much better it is if I ever give up that on...

Below was my status/response to the post that has bothered me Dear Friends, This is important. Many of you (at least a dozen) have shared this post and I don't think you fully understand how irresponsible it. I've seen it posted by some of my most sincere and compassionate friends and by some of my most selfish, but this is not why it is a bad post. The post is about mental health and I will post it so there is no confusion, then explain Text of post: Reminder to ANYONE that my house is a safe zone Coffee can be on in minutes, or if you prefer tea or soda, no problem. I will always be available - even if we haven’t talked in a while. Even if you think it's weird, or we aren't on speaking terms. Text me, call me, message me, anything. I will be there. I am always a shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen. Nothing is worse than being alone and going through things alone. These types of posts seem to show that you care, and you may, but here's the problem wit...

There have been times writing this blog when my inspiration for a topic comes from one person and more often than not, it's on a lot of people, most likely, society in general. That being said, in today's world, many people are sensitive to things they view as criticisms of their character. There, of course, is the irony in that these are most often those who despise the concept of political correctness and view their critique of others as the word of God, but find it scandalous for anyone to question their integrity, morals, or intelligence. These people always tend to be in the lower half of the intelligence scale. As I age, I meet more people. It's the law of averages. I have my friends, my acquaintances, my co-workers, my bosses, and those I deal with for other reasons. Many times these categories cross over into one another. This, many times, causes more internal conflict than outer. I've always been open to people, but over the past seven or eight years, I'v...

No. You are not good at multitasking. Listen, if the average person was good at multitasking, we wouldn't have laws prohibiting something as simple as driving a car and talking on the telephone. Hell, in my day,  mother's of infants and toddlers, could carry a child, smoke a cigarette, talk on a phone with a cord they had to step over every five seconds, cook dinner, and watch TV at the same time. And that was with a load of laundry in the washer, another in the dryer, and everything was finished, and properly, by 6:00 PM. In today's world, my example isn't only sexist, it's non-existent. So why this rant? Well yesterday, someone in charge of the safety of children used "I missed your message. I was multitasking" as an excuse for not hearing something. First off, that's not an excuse and second, no you weren't. If you work in an office and can't speak on the phone and type, while reading, you aren't even coming close to multitasking. If...

Remember when college kids had posters of Lamborghinis with a beautiful woman on top of the hood with the word "Dream" or "Desire" or "Success?" You probably don't or had forgotten all about them because they were stupid, immature, and only the dumb superficial kids had such things. Allow me to introduce social media's version: The Inspirational Meme. They come in all shapes and sizes, but usually have a backdrop consisting of clouds, water, a green field, a dock, rain, someone walking down a desolate road (always barefoot), etc. They contain words meant to sound deep for people who don't have the intellect to understand philosophy, who don't read much or are too lazy to post their own thoughts.  This combination of simplistic thought is meant to conjure likes, gain attention from those starved, and to create a false sense of self-worth, not for the person posting but for the reader. Most people who post these things are not at all the pe...

Yesterday, we recognized, remembered, and honored those lost on 9/11. My act of respect is to ignore social media aka not worry about the petty stuff. For many of us, those towers were not only symbols of our city, but of our youth. From my bedroom window, just above the trees in my neighbor's backyard, they stood proudly. As a kid from Brooklyn, they represented a faraway land, one that I'd venture to for museums, plays, my father's job, and eventually for school. Manhattan, the island, the metropolis, the insane "real" world. I moved in 1985, and while I've been back to visit, nearly every borough, I've yet to visit Ground Zero. I can't. Men Women White Black Spanish Asian Christian Jewish Muslim Hindu Buddhist Other Religions Agnostic Atheist Straight Gay Bisexual Rich Middle Class (when there was one) Poor Babies Adolescents Teens Adults Parents Grandparents Great Grandparents Emmy winners Grammy Winners Politicians ...

It's one thing to be broke. It's another thing to be broke and not have a credit or debit card. Yeah, I guess that first line lets on a little more than one might have expected. Yesterday, I sat on two lines while people were denied due to insufficient funds or some other financial malady. I genuinely felt for them. One woman simply pulled out cash and walked out. The other went into a blame game. She blamed the machine, the card itself, the cashier, and the store, exclaiming her loyalty and her furthered business will be done elsewhere. When my turn arrived, I apologized to the cashier for the woman's words and bid her a better day. I paid cash. Sometime during the evening, I felt bad for everyone involved. For the cashier, who had to bear the brunt, but also for the woman lashing out. I realized it was partly frustration, but mostly shame. The shame of poverty is a horrible pain. Trust me, putting something back because you thought you could afford it, but couldn'...

I have to be careful, at times, because I do forget a potential employer, or even a current one, may read this and think it's about them. It's not. I can not say that for some coworkers. Although my first impression of them may be different from my current ones. Yesterday, I posted something about first impressions, when I was slightly ticked off by someone I met, who I was introduced to by name, who reached out, gave me a flimsy handshake, no eye contact, didn't introduce himself, and made no facial expression, not even a fake "nice to meet you" smile. It bothered me. It bothered me a lot. I have no control over whether or not I will see this person again, but I may very well see him every day. I don't like it. That first impression is important and one that this person will be challenged to reverse. The thing is, he will have to, or his life will be much more uncomfortable than mine. I do not change my ways, to cater to those without class, respect, or s...

Old People, Baby Boomers, Generation X, Millennials. With all these groups, we're losing a valuable item. Common knowledge. The other day I stood in utter disbelief as a 30-something, with a college degree, asked if a uniform with a swastika was from the Vietnam War. Even more embarrassed for him when a fourth grader corrected him. I'm always amazed that not everyone knows warm water freezes faster, that most homes didn't have electricity until 50 years after electricity was invented, and which way the toilet paper goes. OK, the last one is just the ultimate pet peeve. It seems to me, Americans take so much for granted, especially education, that we've forgotten to teach the basics. We're so concerned with pushing religion, political stances, and the ridiculous American Dream, that we sometimes forget that these kids don't know how things work and they grow up not understanding anything. I'll go to real estate. So many of my friends are bright, educa...

The Salesman - My least favorite Farhadi film is difficult to say, as it's so powerful. Luther - Feels like Prime Suspect with better co-stars, with Ruth Wilson's Alice Morgan is tops! III - The Ritual - Russian fairytale which is as beautiful as it is haunting. Good Time - Robert Pattinson definitely shines, but this one has me on the fence. Jaws - For probably the 2000th time. Still amazing how good this film is.  Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now - The man is hilarious, often with stinging social commentary. The Tag-Along - Taiwan horror folklore is reminiscent of some Japanese films but works well. Manhunt - A John Woo films I really didn't like. Felt like an odd homage to himself! Thoroughbreds - Yelchin's last film. More like a play, which works, but confines it.  !2 Years A Slave - Slow start, somewhat uniform storytelling ends powerfully.  A Quiet Place - Lacks any tension, despite what people tell you. Complete dud. Spring Breakers - See my blog if you ...