A Chair

People love to say they are not judgemental, but I believe we're always judging, How then can we decide who to befriend, trust, fall in love with, or ignore? Many people take time to figure out and often their first impression is not at all what they end up being. To be quite frank, this is most often the case. In time, given all the chances, I find that most people will let us down. Not in catastrophic ways, but I truly believe we, as a species, are innately selfish. Unlike animals in the wild, we're given everything early in life, and selflessness, compassion, and empathy are learned traits. I often wonder if there is something universal that can open our eyes, almost immediately, to who someone is. It is not fool-proof, but I have found one. A chair.

How someone treats a chair, in respect to others, is a telling factor in how they treat people. Now, we're not here to discuss dating etiquette and how to treat someone else in regards to the chair, because societal rules could be applied. I mean how one treats a chair, in public and in private. Please hear me out, I truly think it is a complex issue. I realize this sounds as if I'm going to wax poetic about one's love of seating apparatus, but trust me, I am not. I mean this to be my genuine belief and I'm basing it on so many I've seen before. 

This entire thought first came to me out at bars. A bar is usually set up with each chair or stool pushed into the bar. As patrons arrive, they pull the stool out, sit, order, drink and/or eat, then pay and get up to leave. Pleasantries are customarily exchanged and then the person leaves. It's that two or three second moment from the time the person stands, until the time they turn to walk away that I've noticed most. How does the patron leave their seat? Do they return it to the pushed-in spot where they found it, or do they leave it, out in the floor area, not being bothered with returning things to their rightful place? I find this tells a lot about people, and from talking to others, bar behavior coincides pretty well with this simple act. 

But let's look at the taking of the chair. When you approach a chair to sit in, do you just grab the chair, or do you asses the size and weight of the chair, the flooring it stands on, and how much noise, if any, this chair will make. Do you simply pull it out with one hand, or do you lift it with two, gently placing it, as not to disturb others, or damage the floor? Do you always push it back in, as you took it out, or do you push it back in a different way? Do you do this at home? Do you take into account the hour when moving patio furniture in a shared house, as not to wake anyone, even those four-legged family members? When getting up, do you lift the chair or simply push back, sliding the chair along the floor? Finally, if eating, do you check underneath your seat?

I realize this sounds like a lot to do about nothing, but take a look at those around you and how they treat chairs, especially when in your home, and then think about their behavior towards others. If you find no correlation, then it is possible, I've made the correlation first, and attaching behaviors I find commendable or despicable to them. I sincerely believe that the way a room is left after you walk in says a lot about who you are as a person, and the chair, no matter what type or what type of setting is a red flag or a sign of respect for others. Wheyther that person should ever meet them or not. After all, we hear all the time that we should leave a better Earth for our children, but how can we if we don't teach them the simple good manners of how to treat a chair?