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Ode To Dr. Seuss

Dr. Seuss you are so dead,
Your fucking rhymes stuck in my head.
I did not want green eggs and ham,
I have no friends that I call Sam.

You gave us books that kids could read,
The ones who love them all smoke weed.
I didn't care about cat's or fish,
unless the latter was in my dish.

You told us Horton heard a who,
I really don't know what to do.
When I slam your book it makes a clap,
maybe it's because they were all crap.

Just kidding Dr. S, I love all your shit. Especially the later stuff like his classic on where kids come from "mommy had you because daddy banged her, now he wishes he used a wire hanger." Or who could forget his story about the oldest child feeling neglected "There would not be any kids that followed, if only your mother occasionally swallowed." Finally, my personal favorite about Horton's life before he hatched the egg "Horton's friend were in utter shock, when they got a look at his giant cock."

OK, some of those last one's are made up, but don't call me sick, Dr. Seuss is the one who wrote a children's book about an Elephant and a bird having a baby.




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