Every morning I wake up in excruciating pain. My knees are shot from tearing my ACL in both knees and never having surgery. I have plantar fasciitis in my right heel. I recently did something or have some degenerate thing going on with my hip, which is causing main to shoot down my right leg. All this is causing my back to go out frequently. I also have had some tendinitis in my right elbow and for years I've had a torn rotator cuff in my left shoulder. Aside from that Mrs. Lincoln, how did you like the show?
The funny thing is, only a few people even know this. Sunday, I was getting off a bar stool during the Super Bowl and I honestly wasn't sure I could walk to the bathroom. I tried my hardest to hide the pain. It was tough. Today, a kid inadvertently hit my in the balls, which caused me to jump back and lung forward and tweaked my leg, so badly I was in agony for the rest of the day. Not to mention I got hit squarely in the balls.
The easy solution, of course, would be to go to the doctor. The problem is, I know the deal when you have an injury. They are going to want to do tests and lots of them. Not being covered makes this an impossibility. Here's the funny thing. When I had coverage, I went to the doctor 3 times in one year. Once for a check up (a surprising clean bill of health followed). Once because I was very sick and thought I needed antibiotics. Last time I ever go on them. The third was to get some blood work done, because I feared a kidney or liver problem. The tests came back fine. All that for a few grand. Meanwhile, there are people who literally go every week to get something checked. Sometimes I wish there was some type of policy implemented to take care of the non-neurotic folks in this country. What about the 17 years I went without going to the doctor. Shouldn't there be some kind of "we owe you one" policy? I guess not.
So tonight, while I try to sleep, hoping not to roll over in my sleep, only to be awakened by a sharp pain, I will not dwell on my pain. The next time you see me, I won't look or expect sympathy. There are people all over, fighting internal struggles and who have physical pain worse than mine. There are those religious types who would tell me that I endure the pain, because I can. To them I will say, I don't want to. There are those that will tell me it's my own fault. In ways it's true, but in more it is not. To be honest, the real pain doesn't come from the sensation that shoots down my leg or hampers my knees. It doesn't come from a bad back or a throbbing heel. The real pain comes from what I can't do anymore. The bike riding, the basketball, the jogging home on a rainy evening. That is the worst pain of all and that's the one I am having such a hard time enduring.
The funny thing is, only a few people even know this. Sunday, I was getting off a bar stool during the Super Bowl and I honestly wasn't sure I could walk to the bathroom. I tried my hardest to hide the pain. It was tough. Today, a kid inadvertently hit my in the balls, which caused me to jump back and lung forward and tweaked my leg, so badly I was in agony for the rest of the day. Not to mention I got hit squarely in the balls.
The easy solution, of course, would be to go to the doctor. The problem is, I know the deal when you have an injury. They are going to want to do tests and lots of them. Not being covered makes this an impossibility. Here's the funny thing. When I had coverage, I went to the doctor 3 times in one year. Once for a check up (a surprising clean bill of health followed). Once because I was very sick and thought I needed antibiotics. Last time I ever go on them. The third was to get some blood work done, because I feared a kidney or liver problem. The tests came back fine. All that for a few grand. Meanwhile, there are people who literally go every week to get something checked. Sometimes I wish there was some type of policy implemented to take care of the non-neurotic folks in this country. What about the 17 years I went without going to the doctor. Shouldn't there be some kind of "we owe you one" policy? I guess not.
So tonight, while I try to sleep, hoping not to roll over in my sleep, only to be awakened by a sharp pain, I will not dwell on my pain. The next time you see me, I won't look or expect sympathy. There are people all over, fighting internal struggles and who have physical pain worse than mine. There are those religious types who would tell me that I endure the pain, because I can. To them I will say, I don't want to. There are those that will tell me it's my own fault. In ways it's true, but in more it is not. To be honest, the real pain doesn't come from the sensation that shoots down my leg or hampers my knees. It doesn't come from a bad back or a throbbing heel. The real pain comes from what I can't do anymore. The bike riding, the basketball, the jogging home on a rainy evening. That is the worst pain of all and that's the one I am having such a hard time enduring.
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