Skip to main content

The Couple

Yesterday, while watching football, a couple sat down next to me. They knew a woman at the bar, normally a bartender, who was out for the Giants game. He ordered the chili and she had the soup of the day. Each had one drink.

They weren't there more than twenty-five minutes total. He appeared to have had a few earlier, while she commented on not feeling well. He immediately engaged in conversation with the young women at and behind the bar; then she did. There was non-stop chatter from both parties, and my only inclusion in this, was when the bartender asked if I minded if she changed the channel on one of the televisions. I did not.

So where's this story going? Well, it didn't really stick out until they left and I had a conversation with another customer. When he left, I checked the time on my phone and ordered another beer. As I put the phone down, it hit me. Each time the man spoke, his wife did not take part and simply stared at her phone, checking her Facebook. Each time the woman spoke, the man stared at his phone, checking his Facebook. At no time, did both of them take part in the same conversation or engage the third party simultaneously. What struck me wasn't that this happened, but that this is the third time I've witnessed this the last ten days. A seemingly "happy" couple, who have no interest, not only in what their partners have to say, but what others have to say to those they love. The true oddity is that the topic stayed the same throughout, which makes this lack of social grace even more difficult to fathom.

I know I rip Facebook a lot, and it's warranted. Facebook has taken over real life for a lot of people, but when it actually obstructs one's ability to function within the social construct we've created over thousands of years, one has to question, not only its power but its usefulness. While it can allow us to connect to those we like and love, tens, hundreds, even thousands of miles away, it draws us away from those who are right next to us, many times right in front of us. One really has to question the purpose and power of connection, when it disconnects us from what we see every day.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

White Privilege

This was a post I wrote on Facebook after surprisingly not seeing any moaning about the Documentary by Jose Antonio Vargas, titled White People Dayyum! I just scrolled my timeline and not a single white person got their feelings hurt by White People. I unfortunately haven't seen it, but the number of fake accounts that popped up on twitter, tells me it was a damn good show. Here's the thing. If someone of color aka non-white says "White Privilege," are you offended? If you said yes, then you are exhibiting white privilege. It has nothing to do with how hard you work or study, how you stayed out of trouble, because here's the thing, that is entirely the point. Somewhere out there, there are 100 Black, Spanish, Native American, Arab, Asian, who worked and studied as hard as you and never got in trouble, but they don't have what you "earned" or achieved. Stop looking at the one person you know who isn't white that achieved as your benchmark. Loo...

Quickie Review - Finding Vivian Maier

While I thoroughly enjoyed the film, especially the first 15-20 minutes, I was a little bothered by the way the film played out. The interviews with the clearly disturbed brother, sister and the mother, who obviously, was in for a cut, didn't need to be in the film. Then the woman who suggested abuse, yet seemed to have her life defined by Maier, as she tried to muster every ounce of emotion and fake guilt. Her friend, more than happy to be party of the charade. People who talk about abuse for the first time, usually don't do so on camera. The fact these scenes were so prominent, shows that they felt wronged that they were not rewarded. Maloof on the other hand, seems to disappear from the documentary during this part, almost hiding away from the fact, he went from complete praise, to even making money off of her, to destroying her personal legacy. He almost mentions the family of boys taking care of her rent, as an afterthought. Her burial spot, never shown, yet a video of her...

If You Listen To One Speech - Lana Wachowski

http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/videos/lana-wachowski-opens-up-about-difficult-past-and-attempted-suicide-20121024 Today I saw a link to a video for a speech by Lana Wachowski.  The last name rung a bell, but I could't put my finger on it. Lana, used to be Larry, one of the writer, director, producers of the Matrix trilogy, V for Vendetta and the upcoming Cloud Atlas.  Lana is transgendered and has "come out" as a woman.  She was being honored by the Human Rights Campaign. I didn't know what to expect when this broad woman with crazy hair and a raspy voice began to speak.  She began with the usual pleasantries and told of her hair dresser. She then tells of her desire to be a quiet person and how hard the success of the Matrix movies made this.  The first ten minutes is telling of how she's not quite ready to be this spokesperson.  Then she speaks about the new movie Cloud Atlas and reveals the heart of the movie and this speech. She states,"The resp...