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My Satirical Take On My Own Facebook Debating

The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

Joe's Status: I don't know how anyone can really like the taste of vanilla ice cream over chocolate.
Joe: Chocolate is like the best thing in the world.
Meghan: I know right, people are stupid. (Joe Like's This)
Joe: Joe Posts video of a chocolate shake being made. (Meghan Likes This)
Meghan: Nice (Joe Likes This)
Me: I personally don't like chocolate and prefer vanilla, because it isn't so sweet.
Joe: Always have to be opposite. (Meghan Likes This)
Meghan: There goes Me being different just to be different (Joe likes this).
Me: What, I am just saying it's not always black or should I say brown and white.
Joe: Nobody who likes ice cream likes vanilla more.
Me: Nobody?  I do and know about 200 people who don't like chocolate more.
Joe: Joe posts random statistic about people chocolate being the world's favorite flavor without any data.
Me: You got that from a website called chocolateismyworld.com
Joe: You just hate being wrong, so now you've have to criticize.
Bob: Copies 400 pages of data with almost nothing pertaining to ice cream. (Joe & Meghan Like this)
Me: What the hell do jellybean flavors have to do with our topic?
Bob: Copies another 400 pages, followed by, run away like a scared little boy.
Me: WTF? You're not even talking about the same subject. All I said was I and others like vanilla more.
Bob: 400 pages more and Chocolate was one of the oldest flavors.
Joe: Good one Bob!
Me: You guys are insane. What does this have to do with ice cream?
Joe: See Bob, when he's wrong, he changes the subject and gets mad.
Bob; 200 pages more and Every time, can't debate without crying.
Me: OK, Bob, simple question, what is your favorite flavor?
Bob: 1200 pages more and "ice cream was invented in Iceland." You just don't like travel.
Joe: Tell him Bob, he is clueless about ice cream.
Me: OK, Bob you didn't answer the question and ice cream was invented in China, but whatever who cares.
Bob: 200 more pages and Who cares, so history doesn't matter to you, because you are simple minded.
Me: How am I simple minded, but you are wrong and still haven't professed your desire to choose a flavor?
Joe: See Bob, he is on the ropes and is changing the subject.
Me: Joe!!! It was your freaking subject and I'm still talking about it.
Joe: So answer the question.
Me: What question?  I'm the one that asked the question!
Bob: You hate ice cream, that is why you don't know that chocolate is better.
Me: It's a personal preference not a fact.  Ice Cream made in China is a fact.
Bob: 150 more pages and So now we're back to where it's made, because you keep changing the subject and running away like a  scared child. (Meghan Likes This).
Meghan: Didn't I see you eating a Kit Kat the other day?
Me: WTF does that have to do with anything? (Julie likes this)
Meghan: Didn't get the Vanilla Kit Kat, did you?
Joe: You tell em Meghan (Meghan Likes this)
Me: You people are insane. They don't make vanilla Kit Kat bars
Bob: Changing the subject again ME, why are we talking candy bars now, running away as always.
Julie: Are you guys morons?  He said he likes Vanilla, but maybe he likes chocolate bars.
Joe: You guys just don't understand chocolate ice cream, that's why you like Vanilla, I feel bad for you.
Julie: Good grief
Me: I detailed my reasons for why I prefer it.
Julie: I like it because when you add toppings, you can taste them more distinctly. (Me likes this)
Joe: Oh so now we're talking about toppings. You two always changing the subject.
Julie: How do you do this Me?
Joe: Oh so now it's us being awful.
Joe: posts video of a chocolate shake being made, then a fondue pot, then an Easter bunny
Alice: Joe, sometimes people just don't have taste buds to appreciate the finer things in life. (Joe Likes this)
Me: What is wrong with you people? it's personal preference not cut and dry.
Alice: I feel badly for those who are ignorant..sad lives they'll lead without choclit
Joe; You said it Alice
Bob: Posts 400,000 pages of articles on Tibetan monks catching on fire and They probably like Vanilla (Joe, Meghan Alice all like this)
Me: You people should be in homes.
Joe:  Just got your private message Alice, you're right, some people don't understand ice cream. Depressed and lonely people who don't have chocolate in their lives.
Steve: Alice, you love chocolate, but can't spell it.
Bob: Breaks world record for random post not pertaining to subject matter.
Me: I give up Steve, I'm going to go google Vanilla Donkey Punch and see what comes up.
Steve: And the winner of this debate, goes to ME





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