I Forgot A Few

Yesterday, I tried reaching out to those I rarely speak with anymore. A simple holiday greeting, via Facebook, like I've done in the past and many times skipped altogether. I got some responses with well-wishes, but if you know me, that's not why I did it. Christmas is a day off, not a test. People are with their families, happy, together, maybe even joyous. Some are alone, trying not to succumb to the malaise that has set over them. I'm somewhere in the middle this season. Alone, yet still coming down from the visit that warmed me to this insane time of year. Last night, in the wee hours, while I lay in bed, I realized I had forgotten some. Today, while the impact of my words may see lessened, and the tone apologetic, I will try to connect to those who matter, but got lost in the shuffle. I do believe there is a reason that these people, who matter most, were lost in the shuffle. To call it subconscious would be silly, as it really comes down to their absence in my daily life would have brought sorrow for me, and yes, even though I swear it off, I need to be selfish at times; for self-preservation.