It is what it is. Those five words irritate me more than any catch phrase that has ever been uttered. I can't put my finger on it, but when I hear those words I immediately wish these people would be transformed into 9 years old and have Michael Jackson as their babysitter. I realize it's only a silly phrase, but it has been so overused and is now the new "Whatever." Listen, if you don't care to listen to what I'm saying, let me know. Don't let me speak to you, and then come back with this crap. If I'm saying that work has been slow and I have some debts I need to take care of, and I'm worried about if I'll be able to pay my rent, the correct response would be "that sucks, it's rough out there, hope it all works out." That would let me know you listened to what I said, agree that it is a dilemma, you don't really know what to tell me, but you wish me well. But when you say It is what it is. You're telling me that you don't really care, life sucks, get over it." People are starting to say this more and more and in completely inappropriate times. Plus, there are some people who I have heard say this to almost everything that is discussed. How is it possible that this is their best retort for everything.
Listen, I realize the average person is not smarter than a fifth grader, but this is the best they can come up with. Say you don't care. Tell me to go jump off a bridge. Tell me the person who might be interested isn't around. Tell me anything, just don't tell me It is what it is! I'm actually going to start keeping a list of people who say this and then I'm going to wait. It may be tomorrow, it may be years from now, but there will be a time when these people will have some traumatic experience. They will be sobbing, explaining how their grandmother just got mauled by a bear while trying to save a baby from a forest fire and she might die in a week. I will pause, I will smirk and I will say "It is what it is." You know why? I'm a heartless prick who never forgets. Then I will pull out the piece of paper and cross their name off. When they angrily ask me what that was all about I will put my arm around them and explain that a while back I chose to to take five seconds out of their miserable little lives to tell them something about me and they chose not to care. So while they've been living their life, trying to figure out the complexities of Lost, I've been waiting. Waiting to give to them what they gave to me. Waiting to give them the F*** YOU line of the year in their time of need. The reason, because It is what it is, says I don't care about your dying grandmother, she shouldn't have been in the forest anyway.
The next time you tell someone the low point of your day and they respond it is what it is, I want you to grab a brick and smash them in the face. As they try to get back on their feet and wipe the bloody tears from their eyes they will ask you why you would do such a thing, just smash them again in the face and say it is what it is, because honestly, isn't it?
Listen, I realize the average person is not smarter than a fifth grader, but this is the best they can come up with. Say you don't care. Tell me to go jump off a bridge. Tell me the person who might be interested isn't around. Tell me anything, just don't tell me It is what it is! I'm actually going to start keeping a list of people who say this and then I'm going to wait. It may be tomorrow, it may be years from now, but there will be a time when these people will have some traumatic experience. They will be sobbing, explaining how their grandmother just got mauled by a bear while trying to save a baby from a forest fire and she might die in a week. I will pause, I will smirk and I will say "It is what it is." You know why? I'm a heartless prick who never forgets. Then I will pull out the piece of paper and cross their name off. When they angrily ask me what that was all about I will put my arm around them and explain that a while back I chose to to take five seconds out of their miserable little lives to tell them something about me and they chose not to care. So while they've been living their life, trying to figure out the complexities of Lost, I've been waiting. Waiting to give to them what they gave to me. Waiting to give them the F*** YOU line of the year in their time of need. The reason, because It is what it is, says I don't care about your dying grandmother, she shouldn't have been in the forest anyway.
The next time you tell someone the low point of your day and they respond it is what it is, I want you to grab a brick and smash them in the face. As they try to get back on their feet and wipe the bloody tears from their eyes they will ask you why you would do such a thing, just smash them again in the face and say it is what it is, because honestly, isn't it?
My ex uses that Line on me all the time or he says whatever kar.
ReplyDeletewill you take a brick and smash him in the face for me?
kidding.
the last paragraph just made me giggle.