Skip to main content

Chance, Choice, and Change

This time of year is always filled with reflection and some silly universal feeling that something will change as the clock strikes midnight and our new year begins. The problem is, the clock changes at different times, in different places, and for the most part, we are where we are because of chance. I often wonder how often people who are where they are in the world because of change experience it, for better or for worse. How do we make a change if we are unsatisfied with our locale, whether it be a continent, country, city, or home?

Every year we make resolutions, whether we announce them, document them, or simply think them. We vow to be better people, love more, work harder, save money, lose weight, what have you. We then spend most of the year leaving most of this up to chance, making safe choices, and minor changes. Then, 365 days later, we make some minor adjustments and make these same resolutions. Not much changes and we continue the process, either accepting our fates or in most cases I know, blaming the universe, bad luck, and others on where we are. When we experience the good things in life, we tend to give ourselves full credit and disregard all the same factors that contributed to those situations we deem bad. It's silly really because we convince ourselves that all that is good comes from our choices and that which is bad comes from chance, when the reality is, it all comes from change or the simple lack of.

I don't vow anything, because then who is to be punished for my failures other than myself? I am burdened enough by my past and present failures to add any more weight to the cross I bear. I am going to make small changes, like spend less time doing for others who lack the ability to appreciate. I will take that abundance of time and focus it on those who do or simply need me more. I will open my mouth more to ask questions of that which bothers me. One of the best things I did this past year was open my mouth. While I have at times felt the weight of my decision, I know more people benefitted from it than the one who was deservedly hurt. At times I wondered if they were hampered enough, but I chose to let that go. They made a choice and that choice changed their life. It happens to all of us.

I want nothing more in life other than to be happy and not burdened by others ignorance and laziness. I realize to do this, I need to isolate myself to an extent, then seek out those who are willing to grow with me. Contentment is only a thing after you've stopped achieving and if you believe this, then contentment is in some ways, the end. I want to declutter my life more than I have. Strip myself of unnecessary possessions even further than I have. I may need to strip myself of those who live lives consumed with hoarding, accumulation, and materialism. Most of what we have is junk and I want to live a life of necessity. The distraction of maintaining one's stuff becomes what some call drama, but in reality, it's selfishness, greed, and a complete lack of self-esteem.

Who needs a nice home when their desire is to travel?
Who needs a nice car, when their desire is to be outside?
Who needs a better phone, when they crave social interaction?

People who have an emptiness in their soul need those things listed above. It's not to say that we shouldn't reward ourselves for our achievements, but what does it say about society when simply having our health, relationships, and happiness is not enough. When being able to pick up and be closer to those we love is not more important than sending them a picture of our tablescape from a thousand miles away.

So what do I do to make all the things in my head come true?

Stop leaving so much up to chance, by making a choice to create change.
The first step is to better my environment and create a positive atmosphere around me. One which I can adapt to internally and externally, without sacrifice who I am as a person.

Do I know how to begin? No, but I know how dire things can be and I survived that. I'm ready!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

White Privilege

This was a post I wrote on Facebook after surprisingly not seeing any moaning about the Documentary by Jose Antonio Vargas, titled White People Dayyum! I just scrolled my timeline and not a single white person got their feelings hurt by White People. I unfortunately haven't seen it, but the number of fake accounts that popped up on twitter, tells me it was a damn good show. Here's the thing. If someone of color aka non-white says "White Privilege," are you offended? If you said yes, then you are exhibiting white privilege. It has nothing to do with how hard you work or study, how you stayed out of trouble, because here's the thing, that is entirely the point. Somewhere out there, there are 100 Black, Spanish, Native American, Arab, Asian, who worked and studied as hard as you and never got in trouble, but they don't have what you "earned" or achieved. Stop looking at the one person you know who isn't white that achieved as your benchmark. Loo...

Quickie Review - Finding Vivian Maier

While I thoroughly enjoyed the film, especially the first 15-20 minutes, I was a little bothered by the way the film played out. The interviews with the clearly disturbed brother, sister and the mother, who obviously, was in for a cut, didn't need to be in the film. Then the woman who suggested abuse, yet seemed to have her life defined by Maier, as she tried to muster every ounce of emotion and fake guilt. Her friend, more than happy to be party of the charade. People who talk about abuse for the first time, usually don't do so on camera. The fact these scenes were so prominent, shows that they felt wronged that they were not rewarded. Maloof on the other hand, seems to disappear from the documentary during this part, almost hiding away from the fact, he went from complete praise, to even making money off of her, to destroying her personal legacy. He almost mentions the family of boys taking care of her rent, as an afterthought. Her burial spot, never shown, yet a video of her...

If You Listen To One Speech - Lana Wachowski

http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/videos/lana-wachowski-opens-up-about-difficult-past-and-attempted-suicide-20121024 Today I saw a link to a video for a speech by Lana Wachowski.  The last name rung a bell, but I could't put my finger on it. Lana, used to be Larry, one of the writer, director, producers of the Matrix trilogy, V for Vendetta and the upcoming Cloud Atlas.  Lana is transgendered and has "come out" as a woman.  She was being honored by the Human Rights Campaign. I didn't know what to expect when this broad woman with crazy hair and a raspy voice began to speak.  She began with the usual pleasantries and told of her hair dresser. She then tells of her desire to be a quiet person and how hard the success of the Matrix movies made this.  The first ten minutes is telling of how she's not quite ready to be this spokesperson.  Then she speaks about the new movie Cloud Atlas and reveals the heart of the movie and this speech. She states,"The resp...