Sometimes we make things way too complicated in life. Sometimes we search for a meaning in things that doesn't need to be made profound or complex. In the recent weeks I've written blogs that are obviously about my struggles with maintaining a new found relationship. One night recently, I did something completely childish when I did not get something I was craving. Don't read into that last statement.
Last night, while house/cat-sitting for my new beau, I couldn't sleep. This was extremely odd, because I had not slept in well over forty hours. The reason was simple. She was out at a party and I had asked her to call me to say goodnight whenever she got home. In the end, she didn't. In the past this has happened and she's gone home and fallen asleep. While I'm still slightly annoyed by the lack of contact, I am not angry, just a little upset, because it's important to me. As a man, I like to know the people I care for are safe and sound, but it's more than that. I need those words.
From the time we are little, that last kiss goodnight, means everything to us. The kiss on the forehead we received from Mom and Dad was monumental as a child. Some nights you'd stay at your grandparents and fall asleep to them reading to you. You never were completely asleep until that kiss goodnight. I remember as an adolescent, even when at my friend's houses, I needed that comforting goodnight to let me know everything was OK. As I got older and started dating, I spent a lot of time with my girlfriend. When we were apart, we'd always have that goodnight chat, but I remember a few times she went on a cruise and wasn't able to say goodnight. Sleep just wasn't possible without those comforting words. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up two years ago, but stayed close friends and made sure to wish each other a good night. We needed that. Some nights when I was all alone, you may have noticed I'd write in my Facebook status, "Bon nuit e bon revre." Good night and good dreams. Those were the nights, I didn't have anyone to wish me good night, so I made the effort to somebody else. Anyone who might have needed what I was craving. My father said it every night as a child, right before bed and it comforted me. Last night, I had nobody to wish me goodnight....and it many ways it wasn't.
Last night, while house/cat-sitting for my new beau, I couldn't sleep. This was extremely odd, because I had not slept in well over forty hours. The reason was simple. She was out at a party and I had asked her to call me to say goodnight whenever she got home. In the end, she didn't. In the past this has happened and she's gone home and fallen asleep. While I'm still slightly annoyed by the lack of contact, I am not angry, just a little upset, because it's important to me. As a man, I like to know the people I care for are safe and sound, but it's more than that. I need those words.
From the time we are little, that last kiss goodnight, means everything to us. The kiss on the forehead we received from Mom and Dad was monumental as a child. Some nights you'd stay at your grandparents and fall asleep to them reading to you. You never were completely asleep until that kiss goodnight. I remember as an adolescent, even when at my friend's houses, I needed that comforting goodnight to let me know everything was OK. As I got older and started dating, I spent a lot of time with my girlfriend. When we were apart, we'd always have that goodnight chat, but I remember a few times she went on a cruise and wasn't able to say goodnight. Sleep just wasn't possible without those comforting words. My ex-girlfriend and I broke up two years ago, but stayed close friends and made sure to wish each other a good night. We needed that. Some nights when I was all alone, you may have noticed I'd write in my Facebook status, "Bon nuit e bon revre." Good night and good dreams. Those were the nights, I didn't have anyone to wish me good night, so I made the effort to somebody else. Anyone who might have needed what I was craving. My father said it every night as a child, right before bed and it comforted me. Last night, I had nobody to wish me goodnight....and it many ways it wasn't.
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