Skip to main content

Treat It Like What?

I'm sitting outside, listening to the buzz of crickets right now.  It's a warm September night and the sky leads me to believe that rain is on it's way;  I'm not at my house, but on the porch of a friend.  I'm feeding her cats and due to my desire to do some laundry, I'm also house-sitting.  She wasn't so keen on the house-sitting aspect, because we're somewhat involved and there are some trust issues.  So while I sit alone, sipping a cold glass of water, she's partying it up in Newport.  Tomorrow will be her first day back since Tuesday and aside from receiving a key Tuesday afternoon, we've not really hung out at all the past week.  The reasons, for this tale, aren't important, but I eagerly await her return.

While speaking briefly with an older neighbor of mine, she said, "you have to treat new relationships at your age like you're new divorcees."  She went on to explain that by the time you hit forty, neither of you are experiencing things for the first time.  You both have pasts, both have baggage and both in many cases are left dead and buried/  When you're young, you want to know everything about a person, but as time goes on, there may be things better left unsaid. She's correct. 

By forty, you have preconceived notions of what a person should or shouldn't be like.  The great thing about humans is we don't always conform to these norms.  Finding out that you're not the best looking, the smartest, the best cook or the best in bed can put a lot of strain on a relationship. At times, just maybe, it's better to enjoy the present and let the past be just that.  Trust me when I tell you it's easier said than done, but if at all possible, reach hold of the present and don't let it go, because it may just end up being a wonderful future that you would have lost by asking too many questions.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

White Privilege

This was a post I wrote on Facebook after surprisingly not seeing any moaning about the Documentary by Jose Antonio Vargas, titled White People Dayyum! I just scrolled my timeline and not a single white person got their feelings hurt by White People. I unfortunately haven't seen it, but the number of fake accounts that popped up on twitter, tells me it was a damn good show. Here's the thing. If someone of color aka non-white says "White Privilege," are you offended? If you said yes, then you are exhibiting white privilege. It has nothing to do with how hard you work or study, how you stayed out of trouble, because here's the thing, that is entirely the point. Somewhere out there, there are 100 Black, Spanish, Native American, Arab, Asian, who worked and studied as hard as you and never got in trouble, but they don't have what you "earned" or achieved. Stop looking at the one person you know who isn't white that achieved as your benchmark. Loo...
10 comments
Read more

Quickie Review - Finding Vivian Maier

While I thoroughly enjoyed the film, especially the first 15-20 minutes, I was a little bothered by the way the film played out. The interviews with the clearly disturbed brother, sister and the mother, who obviously, was in for a cut, didn't need to be in the film. Then the woman who suggested abuse, yet seemed to have her life defined by Maier, as she tried to muster every ounce of emotion and fake guilt. Her friend, more than happy to be party of the charade. People who talk about abuse for the first time, usually don't do so on camera. The fact these scenes were so prominent, shows that they felt wronged that they were not rewarded. Maloof on the other hand, seems to disappear from the documentary during this part, almost hiding away from the fact, he went from complete praise, to even making money off of her, to destroying her personal legacy. He almost mentions the family of boys taking care of her rent, as an afterthought. Her burial spot, never shown, yet a video of her...
7 comments
Read more

If You Listen To One Speech - Lana Wachowski

http://www.rollingstone.com/movies/videos/lana-wachowski-opens-up-about-difficult-past-and-attempted-suicide-20121024 Today I saw a link to a video for a speech by Lana Wachowski.  The last name rung a bell, but I could't put my finger on it. Lana, used to be Larry, one of the writer, director, producers of the Matrix trilogy, V for Vendetta and the upcoming Cloud Atlas.  Lana is transgendered and has "come out" as a woman.  She was being honored by the Human Rights Campaign. I didn't know what to expect when this broad woman with crazy hair and a raspy voice began to speak.  She began with the usual pleasantries and told of her hair dresser. She then tells of her desire to be a quiet person and how hard the success of the Matrix movies made this.  The first ten minutes is telling of how she's not quite ready to be this spokesperson.  Then she speaks about the new movie Cloud Atlas and reveals the heart of the movie and this speech. She states,"The resp...
Post a Comment
Read more