Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Engagement Rings

A man meets a woman, they fall in love and he wants to spend the rest of his life with her. That is beautiful, but before he asks for her hand in marriage, he must do the right thing and ask her parents for permission. That to is beautiful. Then again, if they said no, he's going to do it anyway, so really, what's the point? Kind of funny that in a few years he'll probably be on both knees begging either forgiveness or praying that she will find her way into the rear orifice of a wood-chipper. Before he does any of this though, he must buy THE RING!

These days the proposal ain't mean a thing if their ain't got some bling involved. Women have become so obsessed with having a nicer, bigger, shinier ring than their friends that guys basically mortgage their future on these pieces of gaudy trash. Years ago, the proposal itself was the important part of the agreement. Now it's the ring. It's because television has made believe that fairy tales can come true. I have overheard many a woman repeat the phrase "two month's salary" when talking about their hood ornament sized ring that adorns their tiny hand. Does anyone realize that the rule was made up by DeBeers to spruce up sales? This rule is so incredibly ridiculous, especially in times when so many are living paycheck-to-paycheck. Even more ridiculous is that we Americans don't seem to mind that South Africans have been enslaved, maimed, and in many cases killed over the mining of these diamonds. But as long as it looks good, out of sight out of mind.

The thing that makes me sick is that now women are telling their soon to be lap dog husbands exactly what they want. Even going with them to pick the rings out. Where is the love, the romance and the element of surprise in this? Isn't the act of proposing supposed to be somewhat romantic. I think saying "I love you, but I'm now in debt up to my eyeballs, but now we can discuss the 200-person guest list," is a little less romantic than say "Will you marry me, accept my flaws, realize that I would love to give you the most expensive ring in the world, but let's work together in creating as perfect a life as we can?" sounds a little more romantic.

Let's not kid ourselves, getting married is a contract. It's two people combining in an effort to grow together, have a family, and combine their resources to provide for this family and live comfortably. Starting out $10-20,000 in the hole before the wedding & honeymoon is crazy. This money could be a down payment on a house, so that you don't get back from Hawaii and have to turn the radio up real high in your parent's basement so you and your new bride can do the horizontal hokie pokie. I just don't understand how that ring makes any difference?

On your wedding day, you exchange rings and that is the symbol of your bond. The ring itself is a symbol of eternity and perfection. There is no beginning or end, but sadly, most marriages do have a beginning and an end. Guess what fellas, if you're not the female, you don't get that big ass diamond back. Even worse, she will sell it for quite a pretty penny, and you will still have to pay alimony, child support, and spend eternity kicking yourself in the head. Worst part, is that most of you will meet someone again and do the whole thing over.

I know nothing is going to change, because in the movies and on TV, when the guy gets down on one knee and flips open that box, the diamond is bright, the ring is perfect and the tears in the woman's eyes make everyone watching wish that was them. It's a special moment. And then we break to commercial and see the Kay Jewelers commercial and the $999 engagement ring and every woman in the world says "I'd kill him." A freaking grand and people are complaining. If I was a guy and a girl got down on her knee and said "Here's a thousand dollars, wanna get hitched?" I'd take the money!

If you are lucky enough to have a ring that your mother or grandmother left you, and you have a truly loving fiance who is more than happy to accept this subtle family heirloom, you are so far ahead of the game, you don't know. Just remember, that isn't your ring anymore, so make this work. We live in superficial times. We live in a time where keeping up with the Joneses is priority number one for many of us. We need a bigger car, a bigger house, a nicer lawn, and of course a bigger ring. Because after all, we all know that is the true meaning of love, isn't it?

Sunday, March 29, 2009

It is what it is

It is what it is. Those five words irritate me more than any catch phrase that has ever been uttered. I can't put my finger on it, but when I hear those words I immediately wish these people would be transformed into 9 years old and have Michael Jackson as their babysitter. I realize it's only a silly phrase, but it has been so overused and is now the new "Whatever." Listen, if you don't care to listen to what I'm saying, let me know. Don't let me speak to you, and then come back with this crap. If I'm saying that work has been slow and I have some debts I need to take care of, and I'm worried about if I'll be able to pay my rent, the correct response would be "that sucks, it's rough out there, hope it all works out." That would let me know you listened to what I said, agree that it is a dilemma, you don't really know what to tell me, but you wish me well. But when you say It is what it is. You're telling me that you don't really care, life sucks, get over it." People are starting to say this more and more and in completely inappropriate times. Plus, there are some people who I have heard say this to almost everything that is discussed. How is it possible that this is their best retort for everything.

Listen, I realize the average person is not smarter than a fifth grader, but this is the best they can come up with. Say you don't care. Tell me to go jump off a bridge. Tell me the person who might be interested isn't around. Tell me anything, just don't tell me It is what it is! I'm actually going to start keeping a list of people who say this and then I'm going to wait. It may be tomorrow, it may be years from now, but there will be a time when these people will have some traumatic experience. They will be sobbing, explaining how their grandmother just got mauled by a bear while trying to save a baby from a forest fire and she might die in a week. I will pause, I will smirk and I will say "It is what it is." You know why? I'm a heartless prick who never forgets. Then I will pull out the piece of paper and cross their name off. When they angrily ask me what that was all about I will put my arm around them and explain that a while back I chose to to take five seconds out of their miserable little lives to tell them something about me and they chose not to care. So while they've been living their life, trying to figure out the complexities of Lost, I've been waiting. Waiting to give to them what they gave to me. Waiting to give them the F*** YOU line of the year in their time of need. The reason, because It is what it is, says I don't care about your dying grandmother, she shouldn't have been in the forest anyway.

The next time you tell someone the low point of your day and they respond it is what it is, I want you to grab a brick and smash them in the face. As they try to get back on their feet and wipe the bloody tears from their eyes they will ask you why you would do such a thing, just smash them again in the face and say it is what it is, because honestly, isn't it?

The Man Crush

We use the word love way too much when we don't really mean it. We always say how we love a professional sports team, a movie, a certain food. Do we really love them? Dictionary.com's first three definitions of Love are 1. profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3. sexual passion or desire. I don't think that I feel that strongly about anything that isn't currently breathing. What I'm trying to say is we like things, but we don't truly love them. In my last blog, I state that I loved Jake Ryan. Love is a strong word. I mean he's a good looking guy and all, but I wouldn't call it love. Seriously, how can you love a character? Maybe the real Jake Ryan isn't a nice guy, who knows? Let's just call it a crush. Which leads me to my next topic. The Man Crush.

I don't think sports figures we like can be considered a man crush because it's our nature to like our team and have a favorite player on that team. I like the Boston Red Sox, but there is no player on their team that I go nuts about. Honestly, the last player I liked that much was Roger Clemens and he let me down. No, not the steroids. He became a Yankee! I also think we admire athletes skills more than the actual person. I think we are drawn to celebrities, because in general, they seem smart, they are rich, they have a lifestyle we wouldn't mind having, and in general they are much better looking than anyone we know.

Now as I have stated, I am a heterosexual male, but I will openly admit when a guy is good looking. The man crush goes a little further. The man crush is when you idolize someone in a non-sexual way. I have always liked actors and actresses and at times was mesmerized by their abilities, but never did an actor give a performance that I found myself almost dumbstruck. I had seen The Notebook, Murder By Numbers, and Remember The Titans, and thought Ryan Gosling definitely stuck out of the crowd, but wasn't ready to classify him as a great actor. I then saw the United States of Leland, which is far from a great movie, but he started to grow on me. I followed this up with Fracture, with Gosling and the great Anthony Hopkins. It started to hit me. Gosling was better in all the scenes he shared with Hopkins. I then saw Half Nelson, and started to realize that this 20-something young man is one of the better actors around. How many guys, have been in this many good films at such a young age? Then it happened. I saw The Believer. This movie isn't just a powerful film, it is the type you watch and can't sleep after. It's the kind you tell people about, but wonder if they will go into it with an open mind and appreciate not only the story, but the incredible job Gosling does portraying the main character. For those who haven't seen it. The Believer is the story about a young Jewish man growing up in NYC who is being torn by his heritage and his beliefs. He becomes a neo-Nazi and then starts talking to a newspaper reporter and promises to kill himself if the reporter tells his story. What amazed me about this performance was that Gosling was about 20 when he did this film and it was his first lead role. He nailed it! After this movie, I would probably watch Gosling paint a house and pay for it. I would even watch The Notebook again. Here's the thing. I watched part of The Notebook recently and realized that I didn't even notice the stunningly beautiful Rachel McAdams, I was glued to Gosling. Thus it was realized. I had a man crush.

I was in denial. I knew he was a good looking guy. I knew he was talented. I knew that when he was on screen I wanted to watch. I never thought about it before, but the feelings I got when watching him act were similar to those you get on a first date. I was falling for him. I tried to fight it, but then Lars and the Real Girl was delivered. Gosling shined bright in every scene, or maybe it was the golden aura that surrounded him that only I could see. I should also note that he is a schlep in this movie. An odd shut-in who orders a lifelike sex doll online for companionship. The problem is he treats her like she's real. This poses a problem for his brother and wife who don't know how to handle it. The real story is how the small town where he lives accepts his new friend. It's one of the more beautiful stories I've ever seen on film. It was after this film that I had given in to my desires. I came clean. I professed my man crush for Ryan Gosling.

I will always "love" Jake Ryan, but my heart truly belongs to Ryan Gosling!

Saturday, March 28, 2009

I Love You, Jake Ryan

As a teenager in the 80's, it seemed as though every summer there were thousands of teen movies. In reality, there were John Hughes films and everything else. Hughes' films not only captured the essence of being a teenager, but made us able to identify with characters and showed us that everyone is special in their own way. The one thing Hughes' films didn't have was eye candy for horny teenage boys.

For boys growing up in the 80's there were tons of young girls for us to fall in love with. There was Joyce Hyser in Just One Of The Guys, who is an aspiring journalist who dresses and pretends to be a guy to write a story. The entire movie leads up to her unveiling her voluptous breasts to show the guy she has a crush on she's all woman. Hooray for Boobies! Before that, we had Risky Business, and despite some girls liking Tom Cruise in his tighty-whiteys, the movie is all about Rebecca Demornay. She made prostitution cool. Seriously!

The 80's had movies that seemed to only be there to confuse us. Back to the Future? Some guys had the hots for Lea Thompson, but I could never get over the fact that she was his mother. For some reason this movie has stood the test of time. I guess incest sells. There was also The Karate Kid. Everyone remembers, "get him a body bag!", but why wasn't Daniel-san trying to bang Elizabeth Sbue. She was freaking cute as can be, and obviously didn't care that he was a wimp. I would have been waxing that instead of Miyagi's car.

John Hughes teased us with Kelly LeBrock & Christy Brinkley, but they were older and we knew that was just a fantasy. His females were too reserved. Mia Sara in Ferris Bueller's Day Off was stunning and I went to school with her in Brooklyn, but she wasn't fantasy material. Molly Ringwald never did it for me. Until she did that nude scene in Malicious. Horrible movie, but damn girl, where you been hiding that body? In the late 80's Heather Graham arrived in License to Drive and every guy fell in love. A little spot will always be in my heart for her. Thank you Rollergirl.

In the 80's, I think everyone gave up, because in 1982 in one of the more memorable moments in teen cinema history, a young Phoebe Cates exited the pool and entered our dreams in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. The best part about this scene is that the scene itself is the fantasy of Judge Reinhold's character. When this movie came out on VHS, I can bet you every copy got a little fuzzy from all the rewinding and replaying. There is no female that comes close in the 80's to Cates' status. You almost feel for Jennifer Jason Leigh. Her nude scene is totally overlooked.

And that leads us to the men. In the 80's, the men all had to have some faults, then show their caring side. No girl really flipped head over heels for Matthew Broderick, Tom Cruise (Top Gun is not a teen movie) or the Sheen brothers. The two Coreys were cute, but nothing you'd wanna spend your life with. Girls liked the jocks in movies, but knew they cared more about the big game. Andrew McCarthy, Matthew J Fox, and Ralph Macchio were a little too effeminite to get their juices flowing. Nope, in the 80's there was only one. JAKE RYAN! There are women now, in their late 30's, who would cheat on their husbands & sell their kids for the opportunity to sit on a dining room table and have Jake Ryan wish them happy birthday. Hell, I might be so inclined myself. Here's the thing. Ask anyone what that guys name is, and nobody with the exception of my friend Amy would know. It's Michael Schoeffling in case you wondered. I wonder if this guy wakes up every morning and curses his agent. How is this guy not the biggest name in Hollywood? When is Quentin Tarentino going to resurrect this guy's career. After 16 Candles he was in Vision Quest as the mohawk sporting Kuch, but after that, nothing really. IMDB states he sells hand-crafted furniture in a Pennsylvania suburb. Jake Ryan was everything a girl could want. Sweet, sincere, articulate, into the finer things, not just appearances. He was rich and he was freaking hot! I mean, as a heterosexual male I can tell you that given the opportunity, I might lean over the birthday cake for a smooch. Next time you watch 16 Candles with a female and he is on the screen. Peek over and see how antsy your lady friend gets. Jake Ryan is like cat nip. As a matter of fact, if you are on a date and you are back at your place and things aren't going well. Pop in 16 Candles. I guarantee that while your date now thinks you are not nearly as good looking as two hours ago, she will be so hot and bothered it won't matter. Jake Ryan is that powerful!

When Jake Ryan asks you to make a wish, just being in his presence makes it come true.

I Love You, Jake Ryan!

Friday, March 27, 2009

He said what?

Have you ever said something that stopped people in their tracks? Have you ever said something that made complete sense when you thought it, might have made sense after you said it, but still people looked at you as if you just beat up a 6 year old girl in the playground? I have.

I've said stuff I've regretted. I've said stuff that was mean. I've said stuff I truly meant and still wished I hadn't. I've said "I Love You" when I didn't. I've said "I hate you" when I didn't. I've said a lot of things. One thing stands out, and only because of the reaction.

Let me set the scene.

I had just gone back to school and was taking classes at Manhattan College. I had transferred some credits and I believe at the time I was 26. I was in some freshman and sophomore classes with mushy minded teenagers who thought the secret to the universe was Happy Hour at Dorney Malone's. I was taking a sociology class with a professor who was about a year older or younger than me. To be honest, I think after I made this statement she kind of had a crush on me. Which after you hear it will probably trouble you even more.

It was the first or second day of class and we're talking about correlations and the teacher was trying to explain correlations and causation and that not all correlations equal causation. She asked if anyone could give a solid correlation of two things that are always true, but have nothing to do with each other. The classroom became still and you could hear a pin drop. The teacher looked around at the bloodshot eyes and asked again. I raised my hand and she looked appreciatively. I answered, "Rape and Ice Cream Sales." You suddenly heard the sound of air leaving 20+ students lungs. There was a long pause. The teacher smirked, turned to the chalk board and wrote both things down. She asked me to tell the class why this was so and I explained that both are more prevalent in the summer. The class ended and I think it was two or three classes before any girl (and some guys) would sit within five seats of mine, but I had a new fan.

That was about 13 years ago, and to be truthful, when I said it, I had never heard that statement before. As a goof I just googled it, and low and behold there a few mentions of this. Did I say it first? Who knows, but I know that day, there was a class full of people who heard it, who did not know how to handle it. Two years later, people would occasionally remind me of the statement. I just laughed. Then we went for ice cream.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Saving Money!

We all want the American Dream. A house/apartment we can't afford. A husband/wife we'll soon divorce or be hounded by for years to come. A child who we'll go into hock for, who will loves us until their teenage years. They will hate us through college, all the while we pay for vehicles, tuition, books, and bail (OK a select few of us). Then they will love us again, just before they ask us to help pay for that extra special wedding and to take care of our children. How can we get to this wonderful point in our lives? The economy is a mess and no end is in site, yet so many of us spend spend spend on silliness. Well we all love lists. Especially us Facebook fanatics. So here is my little helpful list to help you reach the American Dream...or at least afford alimony and child support while living in your one bedroom apartment spraying cheese-wiz into your mouth while you cry yourself to sleep wishing you spent the $9 for condoms.

1. Coffee - A can or bag of coffee makes about 160 oz coffee and costs anywhere from $3 for supermarket coffee to $16 for the really really good stuff. A can a week costs me $3. I drink Bustelo which is absolutely delicious. If I bought that amount of coffee it would cost me $15 a week. There I just saved you $12 a week or $624/year.

2. Bottled Water. On average this is more expensive per gallon than gasoline. If you are like me and live in NY you are drinking the best water in the US. If you live in Yonkers, the best in the NY State. So buy a filter if you're a hypochondriac and save some money. If you buy two bottles a week, you save $3. That's $150 a year. We're up to $774 a year.

3. Takeout - I know you worked very hard and you are too tired to cook. So you order the pizza for the family. Wow that was easy, so you start doing Pizza Monday, Chinese Wednesday, and Pasta Friday. Ok, now it's three times a week and you're spending an average of $10/person on dinner and don't forget to tip the delivery guy. Say you're cheap and only give $2...that's still $6 a week. So forget the actual meal, hey you gotta eat, just the tip is $300 a year. So I saved you $1074 so far.
Editors note: If you are going to order out, may I suggest Chubby's Express on Fisher Ave in Eastchester. Awesome food, nice specials, and quick delivery - I think I live 100 yards away.

4. Eating and especially Drinking - Listen this my problem. Wow that didn't sound right. But I probably spend about $200=$250 on going out to eat or drink a week. Sadly about $80 of that is tips. all you homeowners, why did you buy a house if you don't entertain. Stop going out and have friends over. One week at your house and one week at theirs ( if yuo have more than one set of friends, you're already ahead of the game). Split the bill and BYOB if you want. This way the entire "night out" costs you about $50 a couple instead of $100 or more...and no tipping. Have kids? Bring them and let the older ones watch the little ones. If they aren't too old they actually like the responsibility. You do this every other week and you're saving at least $100 a month or $1200/year. OK now we're up to $2274.

5. Cable - I dropped my cable movie channels and have Netflix. Honestly, if you have kids, how many movies are you watching a month? 4-5? I live alone and I watch about 15-20. I save $25 a month only having basic cable. That's $300 a year. Up to $2574 a year.

6. Credit card fees - even with all the technology we have, some of us still miss bill payments. Late fees, finance charges, and yearly fees if you have bad credit can be brutal. If you can do without credit cards, do it, but if you can't, pay off as much as possible. This varies per person so add you're own amount at the end.

7. ATM's that aren't your bank. I once got made fun of for driving a mile out of my way to go to may bank. My friend said it's $2. I asked him how may times he hits the ATM per week and he said "maybe twice." OK that's $200 a year. It's up to $2774.

8. Postage - if you mail bills in instead of paying them online, you're stupid. That's 42 cents a bill. I pay all my bills online. If you pay one bill a month via mail when you can pay online you cost yourself $5 a year. Multiply that by number of bills that you can pay online. Mine would be about $35 a year. Having a birthday party. Evite people. It's new, it's fresh, and it saves you from buying those dopey cards with matching envelopes and the stamp. OK so we're about $2800.

Now my last two are for parents and these are going to be dicey ones for some. I accept your insults openly

9. DVD's - why the heck does your kid need every animated film ever made? Why, because parents have gotten lazy. Think back to when you were a kid...your parents would be mad if you had a babysitter and all you did was watch TV. They know they can sit their little monsters in front of the TV and get a few minutes to themselves. Here's the problem. Kids get addicted to this crap. I know forty kids who are now kindergarten age who can sing every word to every Disney movie ever made, but they can't spell their name, tie their shoes, or know their own birthday. At 6, I could Fin read and write. You know why, because instead of watching Dumbo, my parents sat me down and made games out of learning. So what's a Pixar Disney CGI movie these days? $15. Every house I go to has tons of them. So let's say you get some as gifts, you're still spending a good $150 a year on these digital babysitters. I just saved you $2950.

10. OK. The last one wasn't the dicey one. Listen I teach after school sports and make nice money. Parents pay about $180 for $12 weeks and that's cheap. I hear parents complain about their kid's ballet and swimming, etc. How it costs them $250 a month just for their kids activities. Hey Mom, Hey Dad, did you have that when you were a kid? I didn't. I wanted to swim, mom took me to a public pool or the beach (yes I had lessons when I was older). We didn't swim in the winter. I wanted to play sports, my dad took me out to shoot hoops or shag flies...by the way Dad, this isn't work, it's being a father. Oh, but my son or daughter will miss out on the social aspect of it. My father used to take me and all my friends to the park, and usually another dad or two would join in. The cost? Nothing! I recognize that this is harder for daughters. Dad can hit a ball if he has some hand eye, but mom might not be as limber or fit into her tutu anymore to give ballet lessons. You wanna know what, my mother taught me and all my Brooklyn friends the basics of ballet because she said it taught great balance. There was me, and four city kids (we looked like the '83 Celtics - I was Larry Bird) doing ballet. Seriously I know there are times when it's better to have a trained professional teaching, but if you take 60 minutes a day after work or on the weekend and do it yourself, you'll save about $1000 a year and your kids will truly appreciate it.

So there, I saved childless people $3000 a year and parents $4000 a year. Yes I know some of you will curse me and tell me I don't know what it is like, but ask your parents what is was like when they were in the same situation...we didn't have freaking VHS yet! Oh yeah and if you smoke a pack a day, the cost of cigarettes is going up to about $8.50 That's another $3000 a year!

Glad I could be of help. Now I have to run to the deli and get some lunch!

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Jewelry/Candle/Sex Toy Parties vs Fantasy Sports

A few weeks ago I thought out loud and stated that "Women have all these Jewelry, candle, and sex toy parties, but what do men have?" Someone, who I wish I could give credit, but my memory is fading, explained that men have fantasy sports. At first, this made complete sense. I have repeated these words a few times in the last few weeks and thought it to be true. Then I started thinking about this and found it to be completely false. Follow me as I break it down.

These so-called parties involve one person making money, one person getting free stuff for hosting a party, and a group of people buying stuff they don't really need to help a friend out. Occasionally they get a ring, a candle or a sex toy that just, er, fits them to a tee, but usually it's a guilt purchase. For guys, we all go in knowing we're spending the same amount, and have the knowledge that nearly half of us will get our money back, with one or two people actually making a decent amount.

Let's take the host and hostess of these events. The hostess of the item parties has to clean the house, put out snacks and might have to supply some alcohol to induce a feeding frenzy for her guest. The host of a fantasy football draft has to make 10-16 phone calls and tell his cheap friends to bring what they want to eat and drink or they all agree to get pizza.

When the women are invited to these parties, not all can come. Just realize that if you are the one not attending, your name is being mentioned the most. Women are catty. If you are a guy and not attending a fantasy draft, you should have your head examined. Did I mention you can win money?

Women assume these things are worth the cost of purchase, because their friend is getting money from this, and what is better than helping a friend. Men know what each player is worth, except that one friend who hasn't watched sports since he got married unless his wife is at a sex toy party during football season, but then the kids start crying and he has to explain to his children that mommy will be home and she loves them and daddy, but not as much as ten years ago, and she's buying supplies to make the her happy.

These parties all involve alcohol and for women it makes for more spending, more cattiness and the better chance if it's our favorite kind of party that they will talk about their significant others shortcomings. For men, it will be a three hour conversation about how AJ Burnett shouldn't have been a fourth round pick because of his injury history (ladies, trust me on this one).

Then there is the whole single/married dilemma. Single ladies will buy more jewelry and more flashy jewelry to attract the opposite sex. Married women will take the less noticeable stuff and hope their husbands don't ask how much it cost. If asked they will explain they are helping out a friend. Married women will buy candles that give off a pleasant aroma to hide their husbands odors. Single women will buy them for seduction. Married women will buy sex toys to pleasure themselves. Single women will buy toys to enhance their chance encounters in hopes to lure a man. Married men will check their fantasy teams at lunch during work or when the wife runs out quickly. Single men will check their teams 24/7.

Finally there is the enjoyment that results in these events. Women in two weeks will wish they didn't spend the money on the ring, buy the lavender candle that smells more like bathroom soap, and find that these toys don't cuddle with you afterward. Men will look at their team, no matter how bad and be pleased at their expertise in sport knowledge.

The worst part will be that for women, in two weeks someone else will call you and ask you to come to another party. The worst part for guys, is that you will have that annoying friend who wants you to trade him Johan Santana for a middle reliever and a guy on the DL.

This is the equivelant? I think not.

Welcome to my blog

Good Day All,

I have just started this blog as a way to voice my opinions on various topics when I feel it necessary. Many times I feel I'm slightly overbearing in sharing my feelings, and I felt that this might be a way to voice them without having to hurt anyone's feelings (directly). Anyone who reads this is more than welcome to comment, as I always welcome a debate, and don't always see the world as others do.

In the next few weeks I will probably piss off some sports fans, some political know-it-alls, some foodies, some movie buffs, and some friends. I mean no harm, but there are times I feel like my word is the law. Hey this is my blog and I can say what I want, while others are free to disagree and if they so choose, start their own blog.

I am new to this and right now it is 3am and I am expected in at work in five hours. I guess the first thing you will learn about me is I am a bit of an insomniac. I guess I would classify myself as a middle-of-the-night insomniac as I have a hard time falling asleep, but once awoken, I find it nearly impossible to fall back asleep. This is tough to deal with at times, but I usually have a day or two where it isn't a problem. I was supposed to go for sleep analysis this winter, but blew it off. Possibly a stupid move, but who knows. Maybe I slept well that night.

Please be sure that my upcoming blogs will not be this boring and I hope to really get some reactions out of those who read. Positive or negative, it doesn't matter. I look forward to sharing my views with friends and people I haven't met...although how they will find me I'll never know.

For now I will say goodnight as I try and get some rest.