Saturday, July 31, 2010

The Ten Greatest Movie Scenes

Great movies are made up of many wonderful scenes. Some are truly memorable and leave an indelible mark on us. Some movies are just a collection of great scenes and none or necessarily more memorable than the others, but together they form a masterpiece. Many times it’s neither the scenes nor the scenery that capture our attention, but powerhouse acting performances. There are those occasions where a movie has grabbed us, made us love it, but in reality, it’s that one scene that brought it all together. Without that one scene, the movie would be a mere shell of what it is today. This list comprises the best of the best, in terms of one scene, that embodies the entire movie. There will be no horse’s head in the bed from the Godfather. There won’t be Ryan Gosling embracing the beautiful Rachel McAdams and there sure as hell won’t be any Baby in the corner. These are, in my opinion classic scenes that made each movie what it is.

Disclaimer: If you haven’t seen the movie, you might not want to read about the scene.  I have attached links to most of the scenes.  Some are only partial scenes. 

10. The Contender – The scene towards the end, when the dust has settled regarding the inquiry into her sexual past and Joan Allen who portrays the vice presidential nominee sits with the President, portrayed by Jeff Bridges, smoking cigars. She turns to him and explains that it wasn’t her in the room, and delivers the line "principals only mean something if you stick to them when they're inconvenient...". Some felt this scene was a betrayal, but I felt it was brilliant and the subtlety in which it is delivered is acting genius. Here’s a woman, given the opportunity of a lifetime and she almost buries the man who gave it to her and herself, to stand up for her morals. The film, right there became perfect. Allen gives possibly the greatest performance by an actress I’ve ever seen and somehow lost out to Julia Robert’s Erin Brockovich for breast, I mean best actress. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cs3s2rR5pFo

9. Audition – The scene where the young object of the lead characters affection is seen sitting in her home, the phone ringing and a large burlap sack is seen in the background. The camera sticks to the young woman and all of the sudden the bag moves and it becomes quite clear that there is someone tucked away inside. The thing that is so wonderfully shocking about this scene is that nothing really had happened for about an hour and twenty minutes and you realize that the main character, who had held a mock audition to meet the girl of his dreams, is totally fucked. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azeK3-pv2CE

8. Big - If there is ever a scene that captures youthful exuberance that doesn't contain an actual child, it is the scene in which Tom Hanks and Robert Loggia perform Chopstick with their feet in FAO Schwartz.  The scene starts with just Hanks playing, but when Loggia jumps in and they play their duet to the delight of onlookers it becomes movie history.  Big had some great scenes of the young boy trapped in a man's body, but this scene truly stole the show. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKrZiddRphw

7. Texas Chainsaw Massacre - It is my opinion that the original is the best horror film ever made.  The low budget look actually makes the movie even better.  People forget that there is almost no gore in the movie, but it is still incredibly scary.  The greatest scene is the one where one of the guys goes looking inside the house and suddenly this steel door opens and you get your first look at Leatherface.  He hits the guy in the head sending him to the floor in convulsions.  Hits him again, and then drags him into his "kitchen," then slams the door shut.  The whole scene takes second, but it introduces you to one of horror's greatest characters.

6.  American Werewolf In London - Today we have gotten so used to computer graphics shaping our monsters and superheroes that we've almost become numb to it.  We accept that people have these abilities and don't really need to be wowed about how they come to look like they do.  Nearly thirty years ago, this movie showed a man's transformation into a werewolf that was so realistic that I still squirm a bit while watching.  The pain that is endured as his body stretches into the wolf looks so real that you feel for the character.  The irony of the scene is that as the humble David Naughton turns into this blood seeking creature, Blue Moon sung by Sam Cooke is playing in the background.  The movie's score, was almost a bit of a joke throughout, with CCR's Bad Moon Rising playing before the transformation and Moondance playing when the main character first makes love to his girlfriend.  Inside jokes aside, this scene still amazes even today.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uSuYWeh0GPo&feature=related

5. Cinema Paradiso - In the final scene of the movie, the adult Toto is given a film real and what he sees is a montage of kisses that had been cut from his hometown's movies at the local priests request.  It's too difficult to explain the power of this scene without watching the entire film.  The movie ends on such a bittersweet note, because the emotions that are conjured up by this tiny clip in both the actor and the viewer is so powerful.  I remember sobbing and laughing while watching this the first time.  It's one of the greatest films ever made and this scene, is definitely a huge part why I feel this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gdpWeW9Kao

 4. The Killer - John Woo is the master of gunfights. Chow Yun Fat is his muse.  Towards the end of the film, Fat and Danny Lee, the cop out to get him, join forces against a Triad hit team out to get him.  The scene takes place inside a church and is so well choreographed that it's almost like watching a ballet, with bullets.  The scene caps off, what is in my opinion, the greatest action film of all time.  Fat and Woo combined for many great films, such as Hard Boiled and A Better Tomorrow, but The Killer is a masterpiece which has very few dull moments. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYz9rq0wnBA

3. No Country For Old Men - Over the years, movie villains have thrilled audiences.  Characters like Hannibal Lecter, Norman Bates and Annie Wilkes draw us in and come to like them, because they are just like us.  That is until they ate someones liver, dressed up like their mother or broken somebodies ankles with a sledgehammer.  Anton Chigurh is not like these people.  From the second he's on screen, we know he's not like us.  He's not like anyone.  Ever.  In one of the most amazing scenes ever on film, Javier Bardem's character goes into a little mom and pop service station and soon gets tired of the elderly man's small talk.  He then pulls a quarter and flips it and then puts the quarter on the desk and tells the man to call it.  The man initially asks why, but soon becomes very aware that this coin flip call is for his life.  He calls correctly and Chigurh tells him to keep it, because it's his lucky quarter, explaining that he doesn't want to mix it up with the others, because then it will be just another quarter, which it is, he says as he smirks and exits the store.  Two men, no connection and a life saved over a coin flip.  So simple so brilliant. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhXJcfczNIc

2. Jaws - Now in the beginning of this I explained that this list is scenes which defined the movie.  Now I know #2 is a strange place to go off of the theme, but I can't have a best scene list without this scene in it.  The scene is the drunken evening where Quint, Brody and Hooper are talking about their scars and where they got them and the joyous time gets cut short when Quint tells of the scar he got when he was on the USS Indianapolis.  He tells of being in the shark infested waters for days while those around him we dying off or getting eaten by the sharks.  The scene is so perfect, because until it, you didn't really see Quint as a real person.  The scene humanizes him, while impressing upon the others that this man has seen it all and lived.  We know right at that point that he is doomed, as if he were a cat who had already got by eight times.  One of the greatest scenes in by far one of the greatest films of all-time. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nrvMNf-HEg&feature=related

1. True Romance - There are few people who would argue that the interrogation scene between Christopher Walken and the late Dennis Hopper isn't one of the greatest bits of cinema ever.  It's even more amazing, because we absolutely forget that Walken is supposed to be Sicilian and he's awful at portraying one. The scene starts to get incredible when Hopper, fully cognizant he is about to be killed, decides to have a little fun with his interrogator.  He tells Walken the history of why Sicilians went from having blue eyes and blond hair to dark hair and dark skin.  he explains that the Moors invaded Sicily and raped all the women and thus they have "nigger blood" running through their veins. Walken laughs, gets up and kisses Hopper on the head, then grabs a gun from one of his henchman and kills them him.  Ironically, TV mob boss James Gandolfini is in the scene as one of the henchman.  The movie itself is very good, and has an all-star cast, but this scene, which spans about ten minutes is the piece de resistance.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqccyUpnZwA

Obviously, other people will have other lists.  It's tough narrowing down a list to ten.  My initial list had over seventy scenes.  But I wanted to concentrate on scenes that really embodied the movie and those which I can go back and rewatch over and over again.  It was difficult to leave Kathy Bates' ankle breaking scene with James Caan, Philip Baker Hall and Samuel L Jackson meeting in Hard Eight, the false ending in Severance or Joan Crawford's brilliant wire hanger scene in Mommie Dearest, but these are ten that I think stand up on their own.  I would love to hear others opinions, if anyone still read this thing.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

True Faith and Serial Killers: A Very Fine Line

I recently had a conversation with a cousin with whom I have not spoken in six years.  She's a wonderful person, but we live different lives, march to a very different beat and finally, I'm not very close with cousins.  Haven't been in many years. Not for any reason other than, I have my own family to deal with, I don't need their drama.  That being said, this one is a wonderful person, who has shown my family nothing but love when she is around, despite going through a tumultuous life that nobody I know would trade places for ever.  Throughout it all, she claims, her faith has gotten her through it.  For her, it's the only positive thing she has left.

Today she called to say hello and proceeded to tell me a story.  One of which she did some mission work with some less fortunate children.  The message was sweet.  She told of her reaching out to a young girl who lost her mother and in some ways felt guilty she couldn't "save" her.  She spoke of this girl writing letters to Jesus, because she wanted to know exactly what to say and not mess it up when she prayed.  She felt that Jesus needed her to be perfect from now one, because she didn't know how to save her mother and she didn't want to mess up the letter.  Her fear was if she wasn't perfect, she'd never see her mother in heaven.  My cousin explained that Jesus accepted her with her faults and she needed only to speak with him during her prayer. She spoke of the stars in the evening sky being cracks in heaven's floor, shining down upon us and how in the end she would be judged on attempting to be good, on her faith, not on being perfect.  The conversation lasted fourteen minutes and twenty seconds. Within that time, the name Jesus was referred to about 20-30 times.  Maybe double that.  I lost count.  I hung up the phone and being who I am today, I immediately realized the story had the adverse affect on me that it should have.  I took it in completely a negative light and came to a realization.  People of deep faith, especially those connected to Christian faith sound eerily similar to the banter of serial killers once they have given into the idea they are caught.

I know that last sentence sounds absolutely horrible and anti-Christian, but it isn't.  Take a close look at what faith in it's truest sense means.  The dictionary states, well before the religious definition, that faith is a ideological belief that isn't based on logic or material evidence.  Nearly all religions are based on stories that have been handed down, very few are based on logical thought (voices from the sky, kingdoms turning to salt, killing your first born?).  Some call it folklore, some call it religion.  Native American religion has a rite of passage in wish a young teen would be thrown into a hole after taking peyote.  What he experienced would define him and similar previous tales played a huge part in what he experienced.  Drug induced religion?  Sounds like something I could get into to and it sure beats wearing a tacky white suit or memorizing another language.  When you think about it, it's more real than what most of us call faith, because it's personal. We're not told how to think, we're guided.

So where do serial killers come in?  We have come to know more about serial killers in the past years due to of the increase in profiling.  These psychological experts put together a run down of the characteristics that most serial killers have and based on the behavior, this is what is used to catch them.  Many serial killers are motivated by visions or missions.  Many of these killers believe that they are doing God or the devil's work. Many see themselves as a cure to the evils in the world and bringing human nature back to how God wanted it. Once caught, more serial killers than not have quoted the bible and see themselves as a savior or even a martyr. It sounds so outlandish, but it's based on their upbringing. So many came from broken homes, were subject to beatings or incestuous rape, or in many cases, just plain neglect.  Left to fend for themselves, they manifested elaborate fantasy world.  Where life was better or maybe they were the one with the power.  The one thing that remained a constant, despite their disturbed upbringings was religion.  Many, when apprehended, had nothing but a Bible in their possession.

So where does the fine line get crossed.  Or does it?  The Book of Revelation describes Jesus' return and the obliteration of those who do not follow him.  He calls himself the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last and the chosen one will join him.  Ironically, a man with a funny moustache in Germany had the same vision.  People didn't call him a prophet, they called him crazy.  Throughout history, mass murder, killings and horrible acts against others have been committed in the name of God.  So where is the line?

So what is the difference between a devout follower of a religion and the mind of a deranged lunatic.  I would say the difference between those who display blind faith to a God who has never treated them well, has never given them the means to sustain a healthy lifestyle and who has never shown them he exists, is not that far off from those close to the edge of what we would term lunacy.  I believe the line is crossed when that which is necessary for normal existence is neglected.  Physical intimacy is obviously one of the biggest issues with religious faith and the pathology of serial killers.  Many commit crimes for sexual satisfaction, even though the crime itself may have no sexual connotation.  When neglecting one's physical, mental and physiological needs becomes a state of repression, there must be an alternate outlet.  Some find it in healthy ways, some because of their beliefs and background are lead down a darker path.  It's that just that close.

I am not condemning religion in it's purest form.  I am not saying that having a belief that there is a God who is merciful and loving is a bad thing. I do argue that if you believe in the Bible, you can not have it both ways.  You can not say, I accept Jesus, but live in sin and expect to be saved.  It doesn't work that way.  The same way those people we read about and those which we have embraced on screen scare us.  The Bible says the outcome, for those who do not believe, is far worse.  We are fighting a war right now over oil.  They are fighting over religious and political freedom . History, the Bible, Koran and Torah have shown us this doesn't end well. Those who believe in a future Judgment Day, might be very upset to find, nobody wins.  Nobody sits next to a throne.  Nobody dances on clouds.  Then again maybe they do. I just have trouble believing that a God who is good and just, would sentence so many people to burning in hell.  Then again, this same God created those who have lost their way and in many cases lost their minds.  So if this crazed follower rids the world of prostitutes, homosexuals, those who live in sin, is he really any different than those who pray at night and despise those who are not worthy privately?  It's a fine line.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Best Dance Song of All-Time


When most people my age think of dance music they think of 70's classics like Gloria Gaynor's I am woman hear me roar anthem I Will Survive or Thelma Houston's epic Don't Leave Me This Way. Some might think later like anything by Shannon or even Blondie. Later it became groups like C&C music factory and even Hip Hop got into the mix with MC Hammer or even Hypnotize by Biggie. The current century brings us house faves like Sandstorm or Raver's Fantasy. But what's the best song to dance to? My favorite isn't a typical dance song. It's one that could be danced to quickly or slowly. Grinding to the beat or sensually sway with the hypnotic voice of the lead singer.


My favorite is Missing by Everything But The Girl. Not a famous band by any means. I just remember being in a club and this song came on and there was something about it that just made you want to move. Especially if there was someone you had your eye on. I remember for a while this was the song I looked forward to late at night, feeling no pain from rounds of drinks. Inhibitions long gone and esteem and hormones in overdrive. Long ago, many years, many pounds, when it was all about enjoying life and connecting with someone.. Guess things have changed. I used to listen to the music and my body raced. Now, at 40, I hear the words and think of lost loves - "and I miss you like the deserts miss the rain."

Friday, July 16, 2010

Things I've Been Noticing More & More

Basketball sneakers have gotten really ugly and very expensive.

All those people who were crying for the warm weather to come are the same ones bitching it's too hot.

Heavy guys should never have long hair and heavy girls should never have short hair.

More and more people are getting tattoos....really stupid looking tattoos.

Remember Farmville?

It's 90 degrees out, why do teenagers have fake tans?

Finds nothing funnier than people who are snooty about $10 bottles of wine, but pay $7 for a glass.

Why do all television commercials feature guys with women they could never really get in real life.

In an appendage to my last comment - have women become more superficial or is it just that I'm an asshole?

The World Cup showed me two things about soccer.  It can be very boring and other countries are much better looking than us.

It seems that half the commercials on TV have something to do with itch relief.  Is it really that rampant?

When you go to a deli and order turkey and cheese, why do they give you eight slices of turkey and two slices of cheese?  At home I do half and half.

What happened to pizza?

While reading Facebook updates it has occurred to me that we are not a healthy country, yet the same people who are always sick are the ones who are against universal health care.

Girls are dressing sluttier and sluttier but get offended more than ever when you gawk or comment.

If I drink twenty beers, I go pee once a beer.  If I drink twenty vodkas and sodas, I go twice a night.

Is anyone else worried about the amount of sinkholes that have been in the news?

How is it possible a huge dish with General Tso's chicken, broccoli, pork fried rice, an egg roll and soda is $6.25 for lunch, but a slice of pizza with pepperoni is $4?  They even give you a cookie after!

I have one job that doesn't allow me to take time off during the school year and another that doesn't allow me to take off during the summer or during holidays. 

About 80% of the films I've watched this year are foreign. I've gotten so used to it, I sometimes put the subtitles on when it's an American film.

I heard about this the other day and believe if anyone buys their child the "kid version" of Sarah Palin's book.  They should have their kids taken away.  Honestly.

I whole-heartily believe that late afternoon naps are why I am still alive.

Why is it that white kids don't play sports unless it's organized by adults?

I have been without cable and a computer at home for about eight months and I can't say I miss it.

Someone mentioned on Facebook that it's impossible to drive by a lemonade stand without stopping and it reminded me about something that happened a few years ago and how society has changed.  I stopped by a lemonade stand and asked them for a cup.  They said it was $1 (they were big cups).  So I asked for two cups and gave them $5. I told the kids to keep the change.  The mother ran after me and argued with me that she didn't know what my "deal" was but not to offer her kids extra money.  I took my $3 back and drove away.  This my friends, is what our world has come to.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

What Is Something Everyone Needs?

I was talking to someone last night about ideas for businesses.  He's got something in the works and I've always thought I would come up with some brilliant money making scheme that would allow me to travel the world, see distant cities and sights or just let me sit at the bar more than I already do.  Maybe this time, while having my feet massage with the blood of clubbed baby seals.

It seems to me that my ideas are always a day late and a few thousand dollars short.  I remember back to a business class where I wrote a mission statement and a business plan for starting a business that would deliver groceries to people in my neighborhood's homes.  My professor told me I was silly and that people liked to shop and pick out their own items.  A few months later, the class was over and I saw a magazine cover article about a 15 year old kid who made almost a million dollars in one year delivering groceries in his neighborhood.  Now we have Peapod and other services.  I remember bringing the article to him and saying "I guess that's why they say, those that can not do, teach!" 

I've had a few other ideas.  Some of which I actually went in and found places to rent, evaluated operating costs and found how much my product would cost me and what I could charge.  One of those ideas was a store devoted to selling sports caps.  I spoke to people and everyone laughed.  My thought was that every kid I knew between the ages of seven to seventeen bought a new hat every month or two.  Everyone told me it's a fad business and the novelty will wear off.  Three years later the store Lids opened up all over the country.  Today it's the leader in sports hat sales.  Some fad.

I've thought of other businesses such as a restaurant delivery system for every restaurant in lower Westchester.  My thought was businesses wouldn't have to hire delivery guys directly and if something went wrong they could say that they subbed out the work and couldn't be blamed.  A few years after people shot that idea down, Chef's Express opened and did exactly my idea.  They didn't work out, because they couldn't get enough restaurants to join in, because their markup was too great and it became a black eye for the restaurants that used them.

I've got some ideas that have floated in and out of my brain over the years, but none that I've felt comfortable with committing to.  It's tough, because even with dreams, it sometimes takes a lot of work.  We live in a world where people complain about the economy but still go to over-priced vacation spots like Disney or the Jersey Shore.  People say they don't want to go to restaurants because they are too expensive, but they throw out leftovers at home.  They buy hyrbid cars to save on fuel mileage, but smoke cigarettes at $10 a pack.  It's difficult to think of something everyone needs, because basically, that would mean thinking like most people.  Thankfully, for the most part, I don't.   But the problems remains, there are people breaking their backs for pennies on the dollar of what suits in big buildings are getting for doing nothing.  Sure they paid their dues, literally, by going to school for four or more years, but there has to be something for us bottom feeders.

So what is it?  What's something everyone needs.  A service?  A product?  Hell, Silly Bandz are making someone a shitload of money and they are the dumbest things ever.  By the way, I'm wearing one as we speak.  So what can I offer?  I've done lots of coaching over the years and have thought of trying something in that field, but the problem is time.  To make money, I've got to put a lot of time in.  This I don't really have.  Plus, kids are in school during most of the year, so you're limited to certain hours.  The payoff isn't there unless working with large groups and that's not what I'm thinking of.  I've thought of a tutoring program for elementary school children in Math.  The reason being that I'm pretty good at math and have had lots of success when explaining it to kids who have problems.  The reason is I make it fun.  I remember a college class I took with a friend.  The teacher used an easy example and said what is 2A*2A?  I answered singing to the tune of Louie Louie, 2A 2A, wooooeeee-oooh it equals 4A squared?  The class laughed, my friend thought I was a freak, but he never forgot how to do that stuff. The problem for me is that it becomes boring after a while and it's not something I could trust someone else to do, the same way I do it. 

So the search continues.  Craiglist, Facebook, Ebay.  Why didn't I think of these things?  Maybe it'll come to me in a dream.  Maybe not.  Maybe it's not meant to be.  Either way, I'll be listening and watching, hoping that something sparks my imagination and maybe a vision of something great will come and I can make it happen.  Until then, it's back to the grind.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Turning 40

So last Tuesday was the big day.  I turned 40.  Much like other birthdays, I didn't anticipate much of a celebration and wasn't looking forward to it any more than any other night out.  I just don't get "up" for these kinds of things.  People might be surprised to know, that despite my outgoing personality, I'm really not a party person.  I've always been more into sitting back, sipping some cocktails under a starry night than hitting a dance floor or some noisy festivities.  That being said, what started off as a few people coming out to say hello and have a drink turned into quite a nice gathering. 

Turning any age is a milestone in a sense.  Of course, we do seem to raise the bar on the importance of ones that recognize the passing of a decade.  I guess it makes sense.  I don't fit the bill of the typical 40 year old.  I'm not married, nor have I been divorced.  I don't own any property, nor do I really want to.  I live alone, in a small apartment and I'm happy there.  I'm content there.  Many see this as laziness and to be honest, I can't say I don't somewhat disagree.  Mail, magazines and clothing frequently cover the landscape I call my floor.  Books and Cd's piled high on a computer desk that houses a broken computer.  My walls are bare of any "art" that I might have decorated to seem intellectual or even interesting.  My bed is so close to my oven that I joke about making breakfast from bed.  The reality is, sure I would like more space, but I'm not willing to pay for it. I have the necessary essentials.  Does one really need to always have more to be happy?

Drinks flowed, as did the laughter the night of the big day.  A handful of people got me some very thoughtful gifts.  Some funny, some useful and some just adding to my already crazed thirst.  People I've know for many years and some for only a few came out to wish their best.  We drank, talked, laughed and just enjoyed each others company.  There were not whispers of this and that. That's not what I'd want.  People called me old...joked about odds and ends.  It was a fun time.  It was what I wanted.  Nothing too crazy.  I was a little late to work the next day, but only an hour.  I had assumed the time would be much greater.  Somewhat responsible in my elder years?  Maybe.

The most touching thing this day was the sheer volume of well wishers.  While I didn't keep an exact count, I did notice that my texts reached 165 that day.  More followed the next day with belated wishes.  My e-mails were also through the roof and ironically the least number of wishes came by telephone.  My own brother has yet to call me, one week later.  Go figure. 

I do not feel any different, nor do I think I should. I want to thank all of those who made it.  All of those who took the time to wish me well.  And all of those who remembered, even if it was a day or two late.  It meant a lot to know that in some way or another I mattered at some point in that many people's lives.  I am horrible at remembering birthdays.  Facebook has helped, but not completely.  I still sometimes forget.  I hope that all of you who took the time to show me some affection on that day, realize that I appreciated it so much.  Thanks to everyone!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Tons of Random Thoughts on Current Events

As I approach my 40th Birthday I think about my love for Rihanna and Lady Gaga, my desire to see Twilight: Eclipse and my goal to do nothing but sit back, eat, drink and watch sports, with the occasional intimate encounter thrown in.  Oh yes, I did say 40 and not 14.  I've been thinking about this a lot lately and all this other shit in my head that you're about to read.

Shutter Island was as predictable as a Keanu Reeves facial expression.
I think my letter to each month has ran it's course.  I just don't feel like bing fucking nostalgic these days.
Why is it that so many healthy old people are so fucking miserable, but younger people with horrible diseases feel blessed, appreciate their lives and bring joy to others?
Pretty people who aren't conceited make me smile.
Vodka diets are interesting, so I hear.
Why do telemarketers keep talking after you say you aren't interested?
I've said it before, but when did standing sideways and giving the duck face become a social normality?
Every day I walk this earth I feel I get smarter.  So what's the deal with Sarah Palin?
How many people can really shield their mouth with the inside of their elbow when sneezing or coughing?
Has anyone but me ever been shown a baby picture and not said "oh how cute?"  Now, not to be rude, I say it before they show it to me.
If a friend's wife or girlfriend is wearing something where you can see something you shouldn't, is it OK to look?
Do people realize how badly they drive when they are talking on the phone with or without a headset?
Whenever I go to a bar, there always seems to be four single guys to every one single girl. With these odds, wouldn't you think more girls would be there?  Where the hell do they go?
Is there anything good on TV anymore?
If everyone got paid the same amount, but only had to work twenty-five hours a week, I bet they'd get the same amount done.
If a person leaves all their inheritance to their dog, is there really any question they were fucking insane?
What has happened to society where the average age of a SUV driver is 40, a sports car is 55, and a four-door sedan is 25?
Is there anything more annoying than people who only tell you stories about their past?
When I look at pictures on the Internet, I get a funny feeling that bestiality is more prevalent than we think.
Not complaining, but when did every girl under 25 become a borderline lesbian?
Men in power are used to getting their way.  Men with money are used to getting laid.  Why are so many people surprised when there are these political and celebrity sex scandals?
If God made us in his image, can someone please explain me and Megan Fox.
Ever drive by large penitentiaries?  Is it really that necessary to have that much unused land? Who mows the lawn?
I'm not making light of suicide, but I can't help but think if I jumped off the TPZ Bridge I'd only get really badly hurt.
and finally a little rant:

You know what drives me insane lately  When friends of mine, who claim to be religious, say things like "oh that guy is exaggerating" or "that movie was so unrealistic" or "that was so far fetched" or "who could ever believe that?"  Are you serious?  Have you read the bible? It's like the basis for every crazy whacked out movie and book idea ever?  Creatures, betrayal, angels, lights, seeings, talking bushes, cities turning to salt, fire and brimstone, Satan, prostitutes, sexless births, water being turned into wine and holiday dinners.  And you think everything else is unbelievable?

These are the things that have been in my mind.  What's been in yours?