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What's Worse?

This was actually a Facebook post so you can consider not being friends with me on Facebook the gift that keeps on giving. 

I'm not sure what's worse (Yeah, I know it's a weird follow-up to my happy post), but this time of year, well, it says a lot about a lot of people.

Being selfish with your time when you can be with others or being selfish with your time when you're with others.
Being absent when you could be present or being absent when you are present.
Taking those you care about for granted or getting angry when those you care about take reciprocate this.
Doing enough to make yourself feel good or to not care if you've done enough for another feel good.
Being adequate or accepting it.
Doing it for you or thinking it's about you.
Putting up appearances or thinking that's what it's about.
Thinking quantity is quality or not understanding the quantity of quality matters too.
Thinking you're a role model or ignoring the importance when you are.
Not sayi…
Recent posts

Signs Can Tell You Who People Are

I was going to write out a long story, using a group of ten people who must carry twenty-five rocks from point A to point B. The rocks would have been of varying sizes and the people who have been of varying strengths. The other variable would have been when the people arrived to help. I think you can all see where this is going, but as I started to write it, I started thinking about other things that predetermine who these people are and how they'd approach this task. There are indeed more variables, but I started thinking about how we can tell major character traits about ourselves, the people around us at home, work, and in society, by the little things they do. The real difference with this blog will be, I will not describe what the traits are based on these things. Those who read it are free to think of those they know and attach their own traits, but if you do read it, think about it and think about the behavior. Is there a correlation with the act and other behaviors that a…

For You

I am not a man who likes routine, yet I keep the routine, every morning.
I wake, take care of your needs, your food, your freedoms.
I then try to take care of the simple things for me, all the while, giving you all the attention you crave/
I apologize when my schedule changes and our time is cut short.
I say goodbye every day, whether you're listening or not.
I think of you when I'm gone. I worry when you are.
I fear when I have to stay late and wonder if you're worried, upset, or OK.
I realize you're home and wish to be out.
I open the door and you're there, usually waiting with your own form of embrace.
I take care of your needs. Always before mine.
I make sure you're comfortable as possible.
I brush your hair and massage your neck until you drift off into a slumber.
I take care not to wake you, should I have to get up.
I keep the noise to a minimum,
I give you most of the bed, careful not to startle you with my tossing and turning.
I sleep light, just in cas…

Amateur Child Assessment

Working with kids for almost three decades has taught me that, in general, most people who work with children, are not very adept at picking up or handling behavioral problems. This is not to say they aren't capable people, even capable instructors, and teachers, simply that they lack the experience or knowledge of how to handle a variety of behaviors. They tend to believe, setting a standard is the way to deal with all children. Not only does this not work with children, but it's also a dangerous precedent to set in the adult world. I normally do some digging into these people's pasts (or presents) and usually find they need structure personally, whether it be for health, mental, or social reasons; often all three.

One of the other problems with group discussions about children is, many times, the person with the most to say is the least knowledgeable, is referencing childhood memories of their own, or is simply someone who feels the need to be heard. Ironic that when dis…

Respect Is Earned

I was having a discussion with someone about respect. It began when I mentioned I worked with kids and the person said he gave me a lot of credit because "kids today are disrespectful." I explained I've encountered moments of disrespect, but in general, I feel they respect me. I went on to tell that I am very careful not to talk down to them and even more careful not to use my being an adult and my position to make them feel lesser. In showing them respect, I receive it.

It has dawned on me recently that many people think they deserve respect without it being a reciprocal relationship. They often believe their position, title, or situation gives them the leverage to demand it, without showing it. In some senses, this is classic bullying and when one looks at those who do this, they're usually lacking in self-esteem, intelligence, and quite often, any behavior that merits it. With the exception of human decency, they quite often deserve the opposite.

As the years of m…

A Sense Of Humor

I consider myself lucky. I am viewed by most as a funny person. I am viewed by those who know me well as someone with a wonderful sense of humor. Being funny, appreciating humor, and having a sense of humor are very different things. I assume, those without a sense of humor, don't realize this.

There are times in life when our humor gets us in trouble. Most of the time, it's because we assume most people can decipher humor with seriousness, not that they are mutually exclusive. I've often wondered what life must be like for those without a sense of humor. Sure they can laugh at a TV show or movie, enjoy a comedian, even laugh at a joke, but that's all a reaction to an outside stimulus. A sense of humor comes from within. It's the ability to view any and all situations, if the moment allows it, with a touch of farce, sarcasm, irony, and quite simply, humor. I assume there's something wired differently in people who can't do this or maybe it simply boils down…

A Quick Note On Workplace Production vs Efficiency

I work in a job where many different things happen every day. I work with kids, so this is an understatement. That being said, I also work in a place where certain things, not pertaining directly to the kids, MUST happen every day. Their completion is not production, but a necessity. So here's my issue. There's this idea that if there are ten employees working, for there to be 100% production, each person must do 10%. This, in fact, is completely false, as is proven by the fact that yesterday, 100% of the production was achieved, despite 80% of it being done by three people.  Production at my job never changes, it's the efficiency that does. Here's where it gets confusing. A lot of people still think if they do 10% of the work and 100% of the work is achieved, they've done their part. The problem is, for one to be efficient, they must individually give 100% and if everyone gives 100%, there will be 100% production in a 100% efficient manner. This is what we call a …