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True Faith and Serial Killers: A Very Fine Line

I recently had a conversation with a cousin with whom I have not spoken in six years.  She's a wonderful person, but we live different lives, march to a very different beat and finally, I'm not very close with cousins.  Haven't been in many years. Not for any reason other than, I have my own family to deal with, I don't need their drama.  That being said, this one is a wonderful person, who has shown my family nothing but love when she is around, despite going through a tumultuous life that nobody I know would trade places for ever.  Throughout it all, she claims, her faith has gotten her through it.  For her, it's the only positive thing she has left.

Today she called to say hello and proceeded to tell me a story.  One of which she did some mission work with some less fortunate children.  The message was sweet.  She told of her reaching out to a young girl who lost her mother and in some ways felt guilty she couldn't "save" her.  She spoke of this girl writing letters to Jesus, because she wanted to know exactly what to say and not mess it up when she prayed.  She felt that Jesus needed her to be perfect from now one, because she didn't know how to save her mother and she didn't want to mess up the letter.  Her fear was if she wasn't perfect, she'd never see her mother in heaven.  My cousin explained that Jesus accepted her with her faults and she needed only to speak with him during her prayer. She spoke of the stars in the evening sky being cracks in heaven's floor, shining down upon us and how in the end she would be judged on attempting to be good, on her faith, not on being perfect.  The conversation lasted fourteen minutes and twenty seconds. Within that time, the name Jesus was referred to about 20-30 times.  Maybe double that.  I lost count.  I hung up the phone and being who I am today, I immediately realized the story had the adverse affect on me that it should have.  I took it in completely a negative light and came to a realization.  People of deep faith, especially those connected to Christian faith sound eerily similar to the banter of serial killers once they have given into the idea they are caught.

I know that last sentence sounds absolutely horrible and anti-Christian, but it isn't.  Take a close look at what faith in it's truest sense means.  The dictionary states, well before the religious definition, that faith is a ideological belief that isn't based on logic or material evidence.  Nearly all religions are based on stories that have been handed down, very few are based on logical thought (voices from the sky, kingdoms turning to salt, killing your first born?).  Some call it folklore, some call it religion.  Native American religion has a rite of passage in wish a young teen would be thrown into a hole after taking peyote.  What he experienced would define him and similar previous tales played a huge part in what he experienced.  Drug induced religion?  Sounds like something I could get into to and it sure beats wearing a tacky white suit or memorizing another language.  When you think about it, it's more real than what most of us call faith, because it's personal. We're not told how to think, we're guided.

So where do serial killers come in?  We have come to know more about serial killers in the past years due to of the increase in profiling.  These psychological experts put together a run down of the characteristics that most serial killers have and based on the behavior, this is what is used to catch them.  Many serial killers are motivated by visions or missions.  Many of these killers believe that they are doing God or the devil's work. Many see themselves as a cure to the evils in the world and bringing human nature back to how God wanted it. Once caught, more serial killers than not have quoted the bible and see themselves as a savior or even a martyr. It sounds so outlandish, but it's based on their upbringing. So many came from broken homes, were subject to beatings or incestuous rape, or in many cases, just plain neglect.  Left to fend for themselves, they manifested elaborate fantasy world.  Where life was better or maybe they were the one with the power.  The one thing that remained a constant, despite their disturbed upbringings was religion.  Many, when apprehended, had nothing but a Bible in their possession.

So where does the fine line get crossed.  Or does it?  The Book of Revelation describes Jesus' return and the obliteration of those who do not follow him.  He calls himself the Alpha and the Omega, the first and the last and the chosen one will join him.  Ironically, a man with a funny moustache in Germany had the same vision.  People didn't call him a prophet, they called him crazy.  Throughout history, mass murder, killings and horrible acts against others have been committed in the name of God.  So where is the line?

So what is the difference between a devout follower of a religion and the mind of a deranged lunatic.  I would say the difference between those who display blind faith to a God who has never treated them well, has never given them the means to sustain a healthy lifestyle and who has never shown them he exists, is not that far off from those close to the edge of what we would term lunacy.  I believe the line is crossed when that which is necessary for normal existence is neglected.  Physical intimacy is obviously one of the biggest issues with religious faith and the pathology of serial killers.  Many commit crimes for sexual satisfaction, even though the crime itself may have no sexual connotation.  When neglecting one's physical, mental and physiological needs becomes a state of repression, there must be an alternate outlet.  Some find it in healthy ways, some because of their beliefs and background are lead down a darker path.  It's that just that close.

I am not condemning religion in it's purest form.  I am not saying that having a belief that there is a God who is merciful and loving is a bad thing. I do argue that if you believe in the Bible, you can not have it both ways.  You can not say, I accept Jesus, but live in sin and expect to be saved.  It doesn't work that way.  The same way those people we read about and those which we have embraced on screen scare us.  The Bible says the outcome, for those who do not believe, is far worse.  We are fighting a war right now over oil.  They are fighting over religious and political freedom . History, the Bible, Koran and Torah have shown us this doesn't end well. Those who believe in a future Judgment Day, might be very upset to find, nobody wins.  Nobody sits next to a throne.  Nobody dances on clouds.  Then again maybe they do. I just have trouble believing that a God who is good and just, would sentence so many people to burning in hell.  Then again, this same God created those who have lost their way and in many cases lost their minds.  So if this crazed follower rids the world of prostitutes, homosexuals, those who live in sin, is he really any different than those who pray at night and despise those who are not worthy privately?  It's a fine line.

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