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Slight Gripe (OK, Nothing I Gripe About Is Ever Slight)

Why is it that people with nothing to say in real life, always post these deep, since, or meaningful memes? They are simply purporting a message they feel is necessary, while most of us, especially those who know them best, laugh at their obvious desperation for personal attention.

I realize how one rejoices, grieves, or simply deals with daily life, is theirs and theirs alone, but we do, as humans, somewhat conform to social standards. We don't wish someone a happy birthday every day or even on random days, so why do we grieve this way? We don't congratulate children on their moving up day from kindergarten when they're in the fourth grade, so why do we continue to post things that bring despair? Part of what makes humans so incredible is our ability to adapt to all the good and bad life has to offer, but sadly, Intenet attention seems to have cut into this ability, which was once nature.

Now, I know what people are saying. "You claim to understand people are different, but now you're pigeon-holing them into categories, based on how you believe they should act." No, I'm saying I'm the opposite of the norm. I don't care about my birthday, I get over major obstacles quickly, but let the mundane fester. I'm as ill-equipped as anyone, but the difference is, I don't broadcast it. Nobody can grieve for as long as people grieve on Facebook, just as nobody can have that honeymoon period last eighteen years. It's just not in our biological makeup. If this were, we'd all have empathy for others, animals, even the damn environment, but we don't. It's not who we are. Sure, we can train ourselves to be more empathetic, but if it doesn't come naturally, it's more difficult than one can imagine.

Now don't get me wrong, a life or death in the family is a life-altering moment and will stay with the person forever. I realize this and I'm affected the same way you all are, but...yes, there's always a but, there are no words on a picture of a sunset that can convey this for more than a single moment. Internal joy and despair are ours to keep and the way we internalize it defines us. Using someone else's thoughts and words creates a layer, and yes, I get that it is a form of self-preservation, where we convey something to others to hide our true selves, whether it be depression or indifference. Yes, indifference is something most of us use social media to hide every day. I get it.

So why am I writing this? It's not to praise myself for recognition of others bullshit. Actually, it's the opposite. Happiness should be shared because it brings others happiness. I'm always amazed at how when someone posts something great online and I reach out to them personally, I find the wealth of joy that was brought on is much less than it appeared and that's OK. We all deserve that pat on the back to bring us up. What I do worry about is when someone posts nothing but negative things or overly happy things and when I reach out I find there is a darkness I couldn't imagine. Then when I offer my ear, they go on and on about others. See where I'm going with all of this? Sometimes your posts about your own joys and sadness spark things in others and while your page is there for you to do with what you want, I think we owe it to our fellow man to think before we post, much like we're taught as children to do before we speak.

I'll end with an anecdote about food and point my somewhat judgemental gaze upon myself. I post pictures of food I make constantly. My photographs almost always suck and the food is rarely anything one would consider fancy. It's simple and I post it, not only because it tastes good and I am hoping to spark a conversation, something I am lacking as of late, but also because it reminds me I'm getting by. If anyone knew the amount of money I've survived on the last few years, they'd be shocked I'm not posting photos from the street. I've had help, from family and friends, only getting back on my feet (literally) in the past ten months. So yes, if you've read this far, I'm not saying I'm impervious to the perils of creating a false persona, but I try every day to keep the words I use to project my thoughts as my own. This way, when someone does reach out, even to share something minor, they know who I am and where I'm coming from and something I posted, with a beautiful photo and some garbled message of hope and love isn't mistaken as my true sentiments, about my life and the world around me.

OK, I'll shut up now. Someone else once said, "Silence is golden."

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