Skip to main content

What I Took Away 7/1-7/7

I'm at my happiest alone, in bed, watching a movie with a cup of coffee. Sure the touch of another is missed, but there is something about completely absorbing a film that makes me feel whole. Even if it's terrible, I look for things. I spent about 20 minutes trying to think of how I'd do it differently and I must say, my version of the movie, which I'll write a quickie review of tomorrow, would be better. Much better.

A friend made a statement about intelligence, average intelligence and what makes someone less or more intelligent than the average. OK, maybe her statement was more simple, but the comments that followed, including mine, challenged and confirmed her beliefs. I believe we're dumb. We're universally dumb and if we don't strive to learn something new each and every day, we fail. Today I learned that some people think Selma of the civil rights movement was a person. People are dumb.

Today I came to the conclusion that routine will be my undoing, People are so completely obsessed with repeating their mundane routines, because it gives them security. From what, I have no idea. I've never been one to succumb to routines and having to abide by others is painful at times. I realize if you have a schedule of 8-4, breakfast will be before or after you get to work, lunch will usually be around the same time and dinner also, but why? Fuck it. Bring last nigth's dinner leftover to work and eat them when you're hungry, not when society says it's breakfast. Eat lunch at 4pm for all I car. Eat dinner at midnight. Why does it matter? Because Men's Fitness said don't eat four hours before bed?

I've taken away that 1% of my "friends" are in some way prejudiced against a group for no logical reason, despite their belief that they have one. I've also taken away the fact that the other one percent are criticized unmercifully for being naive or ignorant. Isn't bigotry simply the ignorant dislike of another? The same as faith is a belief that can't be proven. So what is faith in humanity? Ignorance or is it complete acceptance of what you don't know or understand? I don't know. It's a tough one, but I'll stay with these one percenters, until someone proves to me that taking a side against a certain group of humans, because of the actions of a few, has a benefit. That being said, I hope those few get what they deserve, no matter what group they belong to. Every individual must be accountable for their actions without the benefit of hiding behind a group and without the stigma of the these groups.

Being cold is not a good thing. I spent the last 25 years of my life being oblivious to the cold. The reason was, because I was able to either stay active while in the cold or simply having the knowledge the cold would be gone once I went inside. I'm cold 24/7 now and it's debilitating. It's physically exhausting and for someone who doesn't sleep routinely, it's nerveracking. I fear that it will end up with my having a bad sick spell, which I've actually managed to avoid all but three times in the past five years. Yes, despite me lacking the look of healthiness, I've had three colds that have lasted more than one day in the past five years. All three times they lasted about five days and usually involved me laying in bed and wanting to die. I do not look forward to these moments.

With all the research I've done on nutrition, despite ignoring it, I have consumed more sodium in the past five months than I have in years. I can feel it in my body and the feeling is awful. I'm dehydrated despite drinking and not consuming even close to the alcohol I've been accustomed to. I just feel awful. Truly awful and with every processed or premade meal I eat, I feel so horribly afterwards, I actually feel pained. Psychosomatic? I don't know. I just know that I've eaten so many things that were foreign to my diet that I feel completely ill by it. I won't go into certain details, but anyone who truly knows me really well, will understand that when certain things don't happen, something isn't right.

I'll end with a happy note. I realized that I worry about some people and when they do well, I'm fine. I have clouds over me like nobody knows, but it doesn't matter when certain people tell me good stuff. I also noticed that they struggle more than most, so maybe that gives me hope. That being said, it's this feeling that makes me feel festive and yes, for once, I'm looking forward to Christmas. No fanfare, just the feeling. Peace!

P.S. For some reason spellcheck isn't working and it's 4:37am, so sue me if you want to pick on my errors.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

11 Rules of Life - Bill Gates?

I read this on Facebook this morning.  A friend had posted it and said that every child should have to receive this. I of course read it and started to think.  I immediately wondered who really wrote this, as I rarely see things like this attributed to the proper person.  I immediately found it was written by Conservative Charles J. Sykes when he wrote a book about how America is dumbing down our youth.  I read it twice and started to wonder how true it was.  Below is a link to the actual picture I saw. So let's look at each of the rules and analyze them. Rule 1: Life is not fair — get used to it! - Life is not fair in that we are not all afforded the same opportunities based on race, creed, color, socio-economic background, but in general, those who are afforded the same opportunities to succeed are very often rewarded for their individual efforts.  Sure there may be underlying circumstances, but hard work is proven to pay more often than not and those who strive for succ

White Privilege

This was a post I wrote on Facebook after surprisingly not seeing any moaning about the Documentary by Jose Antonio Vargas, titled White People Dayyum! I just scrolled my timeline and not a single white person got their feelings hurt by White People. I unfortunately haven't seen it, but the number of fake accounts that popped up on twitter, tells me it was a damn good show. Here's the thing. If someone of color aka non-white says "White Privilege," are you offended? If you said yes, then you are exhibiting white privilege. It has nothing to do with how hard you work or study, how you stayed out of trouble, because here's the thing, that is entirely the point. Somewhere out there, there are 100 Black, Spanish, Native American, Arab, Asian, who worked and studied as hard as you and never got in trouble, but they don't have what you "earned" or achieved. Stop looking at the one person you know who isn't white that achieved as your benchmark. Loo

Quickie Review - Finding Vivian Maier

While I thoroughly enjoyed the film, especially the first 15-20 minutes, I was a little bothered by the way the film played out. The interviews with the clearly disturbed brother, sister and the mother, who obviously, was in for a cut, didn't need to be in the film. Then the woman who suggested abuse, yet seemed to have her life defined by Maier, as she tried to muster every ounce of emotion and fake guilt. Her friend, more than happy to be party of the charade. People who talk about abuse for the first time, usually don't do so on camera. The fact these scenes were so prominent, shows that they felt wronged that they were not rewarded. Maloof on the other hand, seems to disappear from the documentary during this part, almost hiding away from the fact, he went from complete praise, to even making money off of her, to destroying her personal legacy. He almost mentions the family of boys taking care of her rent, as an afterthought. Her burial spot, never shown, yet a video of her