Eyes heavy, I take a pill. Sleep hits me immediately, but then the sound of rain awakens me. I stretch, thinking, what time is it? Four? Five? No, it's just midnight. Two hours. That was all and now I stare. Up at a black void. My life? The future is imminent and it's going to hurt. Thinking back to hours before, or was it days? Smiles. That moment when your close, to the point knees touch, one inside the other, but there is no romance, just comfort and trust. My phone's system changing trust to tryst, like it knows. Mocking me, ever so subtly. Two, three friends demand my attention and it is given immediately, without question, I am there. I never fail them, but then when I begin to speak, to look for that same behavior, I see their eyes withdraw, bodies turning, to kook at something, anything. The words fall on ears so deaf, caused by the booming sounds of selfishness. I reach out further, but they are gone. Physically sitting, nodding, performing an act of brilliant deception. My words only background music as they wait for me to stop so they might use my ear for their woes. Mine already forgotten and yet, I thank them and tell them I'm here, as they walk away. Friendship?
Most people I know do not care about knowing the truth or facts, they only care about being the one who passes along information. I wonder if I could privately ask people why they use social media (honestly), what their reason would be. I don't think people without a sense of humor, realize how much fun the world can be. Even during the hard times. So many of us spend time thinking of mistakes and regrets, but if we really think about it, we've probably dodged more bullets than missed boats. You know when you sit by yourself reading, sipping some coffee or tea and you don't think about anything, but what you're doing? That!
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