This week the emotions are all over the place. Monday's events had a personal affect on me, which very few of my friends know about. The events in Boston and those all over the world, where people are blown up by suspicious bags and worse are going to haunt my dreams for the next few years, because one of the most important people in my world is joining the military's bomb squad. I can't comprehend this decision, but then again, I can't comprehend someone joining the armed forces during times of war. It's not my life to live, so I accept it and despite what people might think who are angered by my views, it was a choice and with choices come consequences. I just hope it's never the ultimate one. I've tried to keep my mind on other things, but I keep falling into the rut of realization that things are pretty awful in my life right now. You'd never know it to speak to me and I will keep it that way. I do it for my kids, my friends and those who might need a bright spot in their day instead of the mundane process of hearing another person's problems. I have gotten back into losing myself in movies. I just wish I could watch ten a night. My list of must see movies expands faster than my ability to view them. Sleep still evades me, but that's old hat. Someones smile refreshes my senses. The secret that it does tears at me. I spend more time recently thinking about the past, when I know it's the single worst thing I can do for my future. I am looking forward to a two day trip to Boston in June. Will be strange with out Robbie. RIP!
Most people I know do not care about knowing the truth or facts, they only care about being the one who passes along information. I wonder if I could privately ask people why they use social media (honestly), what their reason would be. I don't think people without a sense of humor, realize how much fun the world can be. Even during the hard times. So many of us spend time thinking of mistakes and regrets, but if we really think about it, we've probably dodged more bullets than missed boats. You know when you sit by yourself reading, sipping some coffee or tea and you don't think about anything, but what you're doing? That!
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