Skip to main content

First Reactions

If you know me in person, you know my first reaction to most things is an attempt at humor, often using sarcasm, which may or may not be kind. I also completely understand the psychology behind me continuous use of humor when showing gratitude and this is due to the discomfort I get from others doing for me. I should add, I recently wrote a social media post about the constant and consistent misuse of thankfulness, gratefulness, and the oft-misused term of being blessed. I realize how we react to things, especially when people do for us, says more about who we are than any other factor. Our first reactions speak volumes and this is why, if we use humor or mocking irreverence, it's important that we know our audience. I don't always do this successfully, especially when I am truly thankful (not grateful). 

The thing that has struck me in my life recently is those who seem to go the extra mile to show, not only no thankfulness or gratitude, but to complain about the one or few things you didn't do. I won't get into specifics, because these people also fall into the category of those who cannot point their own judgemental views into the mirror, nor do they have the ability to take their own brand of criticism from others. What struck me recently was the amount of time someone was willing to complain, both of my efforts and those of others to simplify their lives. Their critique, plus their need for an explanation, not only took time, but it took longer than their own efforts would have taken, should they have chosen to restore one object to the place it had been removed (to clean it). While this reaction was not only not a surprise, but expected, it made me think of how painfully unaware people are of how others perceive them. There was no humor in this man's reaction, in fact, it has dawned on me, from previous experiences, seeing videos, photos, and simply hearing stories, that there is no humor, maybe not even joy in this person's life. It's just one series of complaints, in a life filled with others doing for him, that will never end. In a moment of what should have been a feeling of anger, at the very least frustration, I simply felt sadness for this person, because I realized, this complaint, criticism, and critique of favor, is all that he has. It was this that made me realize, maybe, despite seemingly having far less, it is I who is blessed. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

White Privilege

This was a post I wrote on Facebook after surprisingly not seeing any moaning about the Documentary by Jose Antonio Vargas, titled White People Dayyum! I just scrolled my timeline and not a single white person got their feelings hurt by White People. I unfortunately haven't seen it, but the number of fake accounts that popped up on twitter, tells me it was a damn good show. Here's the thing. If someone of color aka non-white says "White Privilege," are you offended? If you said yes, then you are exhibiting white privilege. It has nothing to do with how hard you work or study, how you stayed out of trouble, because here's the thing, that is entirely the point. Somewhere out there, there are 100 Black, Spanish, Native American, Arab, Asian, who worked and studied as hard as you and never got in trouble, but they don't have what you "earned" or achieved. Stop looking at the one person you know who isn't white that achieved as your benchmark. Loo
10 comments
Read more

11 Rules of Life - Bill Gates?

I read this on Facebook this morning.  A friend had posted it and said that every child should have to receive this. I of course read it and started to think.  I immediately wondered who really wrote this, as I rarely see things like this attributed to the proper person.  I immediately found it was written by Conservative Charles J. Sykes when he wrote a book about how America is dumbing down our youth.  I read it twice and started to wonder how true it was.  Below is a link to the actual picture I saw. So let's look at each of the rules and analyze them. Rule 1: Life is not fair — get used to it! - Life is not fair in that we are not all afforded the same opportunities based on race, creed, color, socio-economic background, but in general, those who are afforded the same opportunities to succeed are very often rewarded for their individual efforts.  Sure there may be underlying circumstances, but hard work is proven to pay more often than not and those who strive for succ
Post a Comment
Read more

Quickie Review - Finding Vivian Maier

While I thoroughly enjoyed the film, especially the first 15-20 minutes, I was a little bothered by the way the film played out. The interviews with the clearly disturbed brother, sister and the mother, who obviously, was in for a cut, didn't need to be in the film. Then the woman who suggested abuse, yet seemed to have her life defined by Maier, as she tried to muster every ounce of emotion and fake guilt. Her friend, more than happy to be party of the charade. People who talk about abuse for the first time, usually don't do so on camera. The fact these scenes were so prominent, shows that they felt wronged that they were not rewarded. Maloof on the other hand, seems to disappear from the documentary during this part, almost hiding away from the fact, he went from complete praise, to even making money off of her, to destroying her personal legacy. He almost mentions the family of boys taking care of her rent, as an afterthought. Her burial spot, never shown, yet a video of her
7 comments
Read more