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Quickie Blog: Hot Waitresses

Why is it men become idiots whenever there is a hot waitress serving them?  I don't care if they are hanging with the guys or with their wives or girlfriends, it is an involuntary action to immediately become an idiot. You look at the menu forty times to decide what you want and the second she comes over and asks for your order, you say something stupid.  You want the bacon cheddar burger, so it makes complete sense when you say "Cheddar, bur, bacon, burger with  cheddar.  Can I have bacon on it to?"  God forbid she tells you it comes with a choice of something.  All you hear is, "want to see me naked?" 

There's always one friend at the table who plays it cool after seeing his other friends make idiots of themselves and he thinks he's got a shot.  The reality is, she's going to be as nice to you if you look like a supermodel or if you have a horn growing from your head.  She's working.  It's the strip club mentality. You just emptied your communion money envelope into your G-string and all of the sudden you think Kandi or Jazzmine wants to sleep with you.  It's the same here.  She's hoping you're insane notion that a 33% tip is going to woo her, will get her enough money to make a car payment or allow her to buy her real boyfriend a nice birthday present. She knows the game and you do to, but you are a guy and we're all just that stupid.

And yes, the cute waitress at Cracker Barrel forgot part of our order, smiled, then came back and said something wasn't available smiled, brought something we didn't ask for, smiled and I still tipped her 33%.  So I'm not judging.

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