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9/11

In my attempts to conform to society, as a tribute, I am not posting on Facebook.  I won't tell anyone about my insomnia, my relationship woes or any of my other maladies.  Today, as it's been for ten years is a day of reflection.  A day of thinking about loss.  Today is a metaphor for life.  When things stand tall and strong they may still be weak and crumble.

The towers that fell remind me that nothing is invincible.  Since then I've lost my mother to cancer.  I've had my own personal ups and downs and friends and family have had theirs.  Today reminds me that everything we have is fragile.  We can always say we'll be there for someone, but it's not true.  The towers were always there for me as a child, but they're gone as I'm an adult.  I've never needed my mother more than I need her now, but she's gone.  She too said she'd always be there for me.

Today I sit, at home in front of the computer, thinking about the day. Thinking about how I have things now that I don't want to lose, but knowing it may be inevitable.  Today, I sit, weeping over people I never knew.  I'm thinking about friends and family that I've forgotten. I'm thinking about a friends of a friends.  I'm thinking that I'd gladly give my life for those I love.  They are few, but they know who they are.  I'm thinking about how life isn't always fair.  A small groups hatred changed the lives of millions. It changed mine.

Today I'm thinking that tomorrow will be better. And the next day even better.  I need this to happen. We all do.

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