In a year that will include the date 9/11/11, a date that will stir up emotions that most won't be able to contain, we now have a date of happiness. The date 6/24/11 will be a very important date in New York State's history. It will be remembered as the day, when we recognized that two men or two women can love each other and commit to each other in the same ways that a man and a woman can. Religious affiliation aside, this is a huge milestone and one that has been long coming. I applaud those few who were brave enough to cross their parties lines to make this happen. It's a huge achievement and you should be proud.
I realize that not everyone is happy about this. I realize that some people's faith will not allow them to believe this is just. To those people, I ask only that you respect anyone's wishes to get married, regardless of their differences or, in this case, their similarities. We truly are a melting pot and over the last few weeks, the heat under this pot has reached a boil. I'm happy to say, we can just keep it at a simmer for now. Many people of the cloth with protest this and many will state that is the end of humanity as we know it. Please remember, many of these people aren't allowed to marry and may not love anyone but their lord. Who are they to judge the average man or woman. All of this craziness has conjured up memories of a story a college professor told us while I was attending Manhattan College.
I was in a religion class and our professor was discussing homosexuality as it relates to different religious book and the misinterpretations found within. He wasn't saying that these books necessarily condoned the behavior, but explained their fervor in ridding the world of it was greatly exaggerated. He then sat down and started to tell a story.
He explained how he was studying to be a Jesuit priest at Fordham and was getting towards the end of his studies. In order to fulfill all the requirements, he has to take confession. It was his very last day before his graduation into the brotherhood. He was speaking with a woman and he knew everything to say. He quoted the Bible and was at complete ease. She then said "I don't know what to do, a while back, my husband left me for another man." He comforted her and told her she was a good person and that he was wrong. She said, "We have a child and he wants custody." He explained to her that she had the right to the child and that not only would god want her to have the baby, but the courts would grant her the baby too. He told us he was confident in his answers and knew exactly what to say. He was hours away from becoming a priest. And then she said this, "I know that, but the reality is, he's a much better parent than I am, he will raise her better than I ever could and he and his partner love her with all their heart. I just want my daughter to have the best life possible." He said, he stuttered and tried to speak. She continued, "Would God want me to give my daughter half the life she could have, half the time, and have the opportunities, when she could have a great life with her father?" He paused. Cleared his throat and said "You have brought up a point that is very complex. I know what I am supposed to say and I know what I want to say. I thank you and can only to do what your heart tells you to." He walked out of the confessional and walked out of the church and never returned.
The class paused and many were conflicted. He asked me if anyone would have done differently. In a class of almost twenty-five, only one person said they would have. He pointed out, to take a vow and renege on it was wrong. We later found out that this student was interested in becoming a priest. He explained that he still believed in God, but could not believe that the writings in the Bible could ever be deciphered to suggest that someone pick selfishness and faith over the good for a child. He said that conflict, led him to believe he couldn't separate religious belief from intelligence, life experience and human nature. I became completely impressed with him after that day.
I don't expect people to feel the way I do. I grew up in Brooklyn and my parents were great friends with a gay couple that loved together forever. One of the guys was an ex-marine and looked like he could tear anyone limb from limb. Later another gay couple moved onto the block and immediately became favorites of many, especially the black women on the block. There was a immediate bond, brought on by being a minority. In school, there were kids we knew were gay, who of course didn't come out til much later. I'm friends with quite a few openly gay people now and to be honest, quite a few who are either not out or don't even know they are gay yet (from some Facebook pictures, some might think I'm in that group). I've never been threatened by anyone who is different from me and I think those that are, don't lack the ability to accept, they lack the intelligence to understand. I hope that this vote, this change, is something everyone can build on and one day, it won't be labeled same sex marriage, but just...Marriage.
I realize that not everyone is happy about this. I realize that some people's faith will not allow them to believe this is just. To those people, I ask only that you respect anyone's wishes to get married, regardless of their differences or, in this case, their similarities. We truly are a melting pot and over the last few weeks, the heat under this pot has reached a boil. I'm happy to say, we can just keep it at a simmer for now. Many people of the cloth with protest this and many will state that is the end of humanity as we know it. Please remember, many of these people aren't allowed to marry and may not love anyone but their lord. Who are they to judge the average man or woman. All of this craziness has conjured up memories of a story a college professor told us while I was attending Manhattan College.
I was in a religion class and our professor was discussing homosexuality as it relates to different religious book and the misinterpretations found within. He wasn't saying that these books necessarily condoned the behavior, but explained their fervor in ridding the world of it was greatly exaggerated. He then sat down and started to tell a story.
He explained how he was studying to be a Jesuit priest at Fordham and was getting towards the end of his studies. In order to fulfill all the requirements, he has to take confession. It was his very last day before his graduation into the brotherhood. He was speaking with a woman and he knew everything to say. He quoted the Bible and was at complete ease. She then said "I don't know what to do, a while back, my husband left me for another man." He comforted her and told her she was a good person and that he was wrong. She said, "We have a child and he wants custody." He explained to her that she had the right to the child and that not only would god want her to have the baby, but the courts would grant her the baby too. He told us he was confident in his answers and knew exactly what to say. He was hours away from becoming a priest. And then she said this, "I know that, but the reality is, he's a much better parent than I am, he will raise her better than I ever could and he and his partner love her with all their heart. I just want my daughter to have the best life possible." He said, he stuttered and tried to speak. She continued, "Would God want me to give my daughter half the life she could have, half the time, and have the opportunities, when she could have a great life with her father?" He paused. Cleared his throat and said "You have brought up a point that is very complex. I know what I am supposed to say and I know what I want to say. I thank you and can only to do what your heart tells you to." He walked out of the confessional and walked out of the church and never returned.
The class paused and many were conflicted. He asked me if anyone would have done differently. In a class of almost twenty-five, only one person said they would have. He pointed out, to take a vow and renege on it was wrong. We later found out that this student was interested in becoming a priest. He explained that he still believed in God, but could not believe that the writings in the Bible could ever be deciphered to suggest that someone pick selfishness and faith over the good for a child. He said that conflict, led him to believe he couldn't separate religious belief from intelligence, life experience and human nature. I became completely impressed with him after that day.
I don't expect people to feel the way I do. I grew up in Brooklyn and my parents were great friends with a gay couple that loved together forever. One of the guys was an ex-marine and looked like he could tear anyone limb from limb. Later another gay couple moved onto the block and immediately became favorites of many, especially the black women on the block. There was a immediate bond, brought on by being a minority. In school, there were kids we knew were gay, who of course didn't come out til much later. I'm friends with quite a few openly gay people now and to be honest, quite a few who are either not out or don't even know they are gay yet (from some Facebook pictures, some might think I'm in that group). I've never been threatened by anyone who is different from me and I think those that are, don't lack the ability to accept, they lack the intelligence to understand. I hope that this vote, this change, is something everyone can build on and one day, it won't be labeled same sex marriage, but just...Marriage.
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